Six Months

A Story by Ellaiza

After six months of not talking to each other, after twenty four weeks of not contacting me, you messaged me all of a sudden saying you miss me. I stared blankly at the letters scattered on my screen and tried to sink in everything. But the only thing that made into my mind are the memories of our 2-year relationship.

I started remembering the day I first fell in love with you. It was on my 18th birthday when you first gave me a painting of the night sky while saying they are as beautiful as my eyes. I remembered then how afterwards your arms were the only home I recognized. The warmth of your body became the bonfire I've always been longing to feel. Your eyes became my star that guided me while trying to reach my destination.

"When all the candle lights have been blown off, I'll stay here to light your path even if that means I'll have to offer my eyes for them to be the stars for you." You said. And dear, that was the sweetest thing someone can say.

And so I believed your words. I remember you telling me that I am the sun and you are the moon, without me, you will not shine in the dark. I remember you telling me that my hands are as soft as your mother's touches on you when you were a baby and how my voice reminds you of her gentleness.

I remember the day we sat at the park, pointing at old couples and imagining that we are them. I remember pointing at kids and imagining them as our children and grandchildren. I remember you promising forever.

Oh, and now, I also remember the past six months. The past six months where I have suffered because you told me I wasn't enough. That the love you once felt faded into the moonlight and my eyes no longer feels like home.

I remember hating the burning sensation of the whiskey on my throat but still trying to love it anyway because it makes me forget the flames you threw at my heart. I remember loving the headaches and little amnesia when I drink myself to sleep. Because then even just for a minute, I forget your name and I forget who you are.

But oh my god it hurts so much that when I sober up, you're not there by my side. Baby, I suffered for six months and all it took was an "I miss you" for all the memories to come flooding back. I tried my best to forget you but why did you number have to appear at my screen again? Why does it say the same message you used to tell me? Why? Why now?