Glide or Grate

Sometimes we wrap ourselves

in Ego to protect us from the world

It's especially so after we come out

the other side of trauma or loss...

If we don't bow down to the weight

of grief and despair, die with the death

of whatever we're losing, then

our Ego wraps around us to keep us safe

As we continue to stand and move within

the world as if we are whole, the same

as before what hurt us and nearly took us

down entered our life and changed things

It's very much in line with fake it until you

make it. We convince ourselves of our worth,

Our ok-ness so that we can face the days

without the visceral and ugly scar showing

We put all of the vulnerabilities and hearts

on sleeves away and move with power

just to remind ourselves that we have some, 

that it didn't get taken or die in the fire

And as we rub up against the world

with fists raised and eyes unblinking,

unafraid of the conflict or criticism

we find that there are those who see 

What's really happening, or maybe they don't

but they see the way it grates instead of

glides against everything around us and when 

they call us on our imperfections our

Ego stands up and says "I'm not listening

to your version of me because you aren't

any better and I will do whatever I want"

and in that moment we have a choice

To be reminded of how we got there

and to let it die a little; to let someone 

see what's real instead of this inflated 

defense against all perceived attacks

Or to die a little ourselves because 

we won't let the walls down to heal from the 

wounds that lay just beneath the surface

with the touch of someone willing to understand.