Burnt Out

A little something for you hopeless romantics. ;)

My heart you did set aflame
and the smoke billowed up through my esophagus and filled my lungs
til all the oxygen had been replaced.
Then the smoke choked me,
lumped up and lodging itself tight in my throat til it commanded the tears softly but heavily flow from my eyes.
Eventually the tears put out the flame,
and I was left burnt out.

Author's Note

Critique me as you would yourself.

Elleana xx

Reviews

[Kesch (Finding Julia)]

this is wonderful, it's cute

[Lea Sheryn]

This is wonderfully full of emotion. I like it very much.

[Lyanth]

Doesn't everything have a dark side, even love..
I like it.
My only suggestion would be maybe " Til ' Can be " 'Til "
Great job, I enjoyed the read, keep writing.

[MarkAndTheOcean]

Cute little poem, full of that classic Romeo and Juliet angsty romance haha, Keep it up :)