Apartment 10

Something is terribly wrong with the bedroom...

I entered the apartment; a look of approval upon my face. But I was too sleepy, what with the moving and all. I put down my bag and headed to the bedroom.

At the sight of the bed, my heart skipped. Finally, I’m able to rest after the long day!

I laid, face down on the sheets. Ah! So soft.

But as I was drifting off into the arms of Morpheus, I felt drops of water on my back. What the…? I muttered with extreme irritation. I turned to where it came from… goodness gracious, there is no roof!

Reviews

[Geon Quuin]

i don't get it . . .

[Monster ^.^]

Ouch. hahaha. It's actually pretty literal :)

[Priscilla Sayers]

What a surprise! I like the down to earth feel. It could happen to anyone. It was amusing dear friend!

[Monster ^.^]

Thanks! I'm really glad you like it! Though I'm not so sure it could happen to anyone sane -- only finding out later there is no roof! HAHA

[Priscilla Sayers]

LOL! You never know until you're the one:)

[Monster ^.^]

Now, you're scaring me! Hahaha

[Priscilla Sayers]

Lol:)

[Monster ^.^]

:)
There are more stories like that that I wrote, you know :))

[The Witness]

This is really amusing. I really enjoyed this.

[Monster ^.^]

I'm happy you did :)

[critic h]

though the poem awesomely fantastic worth reading but it seems incomplete. You gave the intro but the climax seems to be missing.

[Monster ^.^]

Well, it's for a 100 words contest... exceeding that number would obviously disqualify me :)

[critic h]

oooh

[critic h]

Btw which 100 words contest u were talking about. Post the link plz

[Aeneas Barton]

haha very nice. People always think short stories need to be long, when in reality they can be as short as a sentence. I like what you did with this here. I will be sure to take a peek at more of your work.

[Monster ^.^]

Thank you Aeneas... and your name reminds of a book entitled Aeneid, where a hero with your name stars :)

[AWickedMoon]

May I make a suggestion for the first line? You could go with
"a look of aproval upon my face."

Just a suggestion tho! I loved the rest of it. :)

[Monster ^.^]

That does sound better! Thank you :)

[AWickedMoon]

Anytime! :)

[sithlordjp]

oh no! :) Didn't expect that ending! I appreciate that twist, made for a fun read! Well done!

[Monster ^.^]

thank you :)

[Salar Majak]

this is really good! and funny too, the ending is brilliant too! loved it

[Monster ^.^]

Thanks! Did you write funny ones like this and my other one too? If so, id like to read them :))

[Salar Majak]

i enjoy reading the funny ones but sadly don't have the enough talent to write them XD

[Monster ^.^]

That cant be true! If you enjoy them, you have a knack for them! Plus you van expand :)

[Salar Majak]

thanks :D i'll try writing some! and i'll show them to you for some thoughts :D

[Monster ^.^]

I know you can pull that off! I sense you have good sense of humor :)

[Salar Majak]

thank you :D i'll try

[Monster ^.^]

Good :)

[Chris]

You need to THINK in English in order to WRITE in English. Translating your thoughts loses the flavor.

[Monster ^.^]

Yes, thank you for that... but this is actually for a 100 word contest, and I supposed that a surprising end after "flavorless thoughts" could very much make people laugh

[Chris]

Cool. Contests are a way of refining our thoughts. Humor must feel natural yes? Smooth and flowing?

[Monster ^.^]

Yes, very much so. :) I join contests for that fact. Not for the winning, but to train myself to make in accordance to rules :)

[Chris]

Hmmm... contests give exposure - someone else to read and "approve" of your effort. We have to be careful not to get lost in seeking others' approval of our thoughts... because then we shape our thoughts THEIR way and not OUR way - yes?

[Monster ^.^]

indeed, I get your point... nevertheless, joining contests is fun...

[Chris]

can't win the lottery if you don't invest in a ticket...