A Poem of a New Nothing

And all that's left is
Nothing,
A desolate void where hope used to burn,
Burn wild and free fire.
But it ate away sanity, reality, certainty,
Corroding like these new found ammonia thoughts.
[[tastes like liberty]]
Corroding like tarnish
on what once was imagination.

And all that's left are forgotten memories.
Searching, cutting holes in this mind,
Ripping through walls,
Barriers of self-preservation
That render thought useless.
[[safety is for the weak]]
Let this rusting shell
With its mechanic heart still beating
Destroy itself in the turmoil
That immitates this new personality.


And all that's left is misanthropy.
Hiding away,
Always burying the past
And smothering the future.
[[suffering is more intoxicating]]
Refusing to open these parched
And near silent lips
Where fate is at the hands of others,
Those who would strive to see pain
In the eyes of their friends.
[[shoot yourself instead]]
Misplaced trust,
Fallacies, and wrongs
From the aide of your Passion.


And all that's left is life.
The hollowness of cruel actuality,
Never a choice,
Forced agony and relentless hate,
By the fierce master Life.
A puppeteer of this being
That hangs by silken threads.
Where every breath of existence
And sigh of death
Is a reminder that continuation
Is worthless.

Author's Note

Please write critical reviews! I want to improve. :)

Reviews

[Silvario]

Wow, very powerful. Wonderfully written with strong emotion and talent. I enjoyed the easy flow and pace of this piece along with its potency. I love any writing that's able to invoke emotion and this did just that. I'm also loving the little, almost subliminal ... or almost a secondary voice ... within the "[[ ]]'s.

Very well done indeed.

[John Stussy]

Excellently done poem for the most part, your cold tone worked very well. The only thing I could consider a small qualm I had with the poem was the second line, it fits as it is, but at the same time it feels like it doesn't quite fit. It's hard to explain, maybe it's just me. Anyhow, well done on this piece.

[Bran the Broken]

Ah....vivid, deep, tormented, strong....well-worded.....

good stuff