Bus Stop

Bus Stop
 

The smell of public disgusts me.

The cool aluminium pressed against my skin,

quick to remind me of my worth.

A snigger.

A laconic exchange.

A violent orchestra makes me ashamed.

Grotesque colours of institution.

A rainbow of rage

replaced by servility.

I am a rabbit in a cage.

 

This place does not liberate me.

 

Reviews

[Warrior Bard]

This was sufficiently descriptive to allow me to see, despite my initial incomprehension. I love taking the bus, especially in foreign countries. I love the jostling inconvenience of being smothered in among sweaty, smelly, much-loved human beings. I have never considered what it would be like to have to take the bus, because I had no other way to get there.

[Holly Mason]

this weighs you down brings you down
it shows through your words with a heavy foot
riding the bus because you have to...wanting the freedoms of your own...working so hard but seeming to not get anywhere that you truly want to be
I have felt this as well in my life
I am not envious of what others have but envious of the world view they perceive that seems out of my grasp
we are good enough riding a bus proves that but I do not hold it against people they have been raised the way they have been raised
to me behind every b&w car door there is also a story to tell and it maybe worse then ours
this is written with such great emotion I got involved in your words
thank you for sharing

[Elisam]

Hi Holly,

Thanks so much for your comments. I'm really glad that you got exactly what I was trying to say in my poem. One thing I have enjoyed and did not expect with this poem is to have people tell me they have felt the same way, and from all over the world. Thanks so much and I look forward to reading some of your work. thanks, Elisa

[zainul]

Eloquent expression.
This is the case of most people who can't a private car.
I feel the same every now and then.
But, it reminds me of my worth and I feel like a rabbit in a cage like you.
Thanks for sharing.

[Muse]

Unique..and I like! I lived in Chicago for a few years, took the public transportation system, I know how it feels to be around strangers packed like a sardine. I felt trapped...and dirty!

On a more serious note...it's funny how a public bus stop can be so humbling...to share that same chair that supported possibly a sleeping homeless man....later on that day a lawyer or Doctor...shared by a single mother who work the 911 to support her two children...a drug dealer....we are all equals during that "time and space."

[Elisam]

Thanks Muse, I'm glad you liked it!

[Muse]

Unique..and I like! I lived in Chicago for a few years, took the public transportation system, I know how it feels to be around strangers packed like a sardine. I felt trapped...and dirty!

On a more serious note...it's funny how a public bus stop can be so humbling...to share that same chair that supported possibly a sleeping homeless man....later on that day a lawyer or Doctor...shared with a single mother with supports her two children...a drug dealer....we are all equals during that "time and space."

[Chris]

Transit stops are the same world-wide...

[Elisam]

Too true, and like Muse said, they have a way of making us all the same, humbling.

[cooper]

Made me laugh the second time I read this. Reminds me of NYC. Best line is emarasment over the orchestra! I don't know why you were feeling like a fearful newbie, I found your poem well done! :))

[Elisam]

What a lovely compliment! Thanks Cooper : )

[Sami Khalil]

I am a rabbit in a cage.



This place does not liberate me.
I like the ending the most...:)

[Elisam]

Thanks Sami ( :

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)