Say I Love You

The room was dimly lit by the early morning light that snuck in through the closed blinds. She laid on her side, simply staring at him. Finally he turned his head so that their eyes met. “What?” He asked, eyebrows crinkling together as he reached for her hand.

She shrugged, biting her inner lip before saying, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” He said softly, eyebrows still pulled together as he looked over her face.  She could tell from the way that he was studying her that he was still trying to figure out what was wrong.

“I just…” She trailed off and then huffed out a breath, rolling onto her back. “It’s crazy to me that we’re here, ya know? It’s not that I didn’t expect to get here with you, but with someone in general.  And the fact that it’s with you…I’m just really glad to have you in my life, and I just want you to know how much you mean to me.” She rolled back onto her side to look at him as she finished speaking.  Opening up like this wasn’t easy for her, but holding it in felt like a crime.  She wanted so badly to hear similar words leave his lips, and that made her even more desperate to tell him just how she felt.  Everyone deserved to know when they made someone’s world better.

“So, I love you.” She repeated, the words sounding shaky to her own ears.

His free hand cupped her cheek and he pressed his lips to hers.  The kiss wasn’t heated and it wasn’t desperate. It was soft, their bodies frozen in that moment.  Something about just the way his lips felt against her own made her feel reassured in their love. 

She pressed her face into his chest, just needing to be close to him.  His arms held her in a strong, protective grip.  There was still so much more she could say to him, but that felt like enough in that moment.  She didn’t want to get into anything deep after saying so little, but something so sweet. But even as they laid there, she couldn’t help but think of the other things she wanted to say.

He made her into a different person, and in this case that wasn’t a bad thing.  It’s not that she changed to become someone he liked, it’s that he brought out traits in her that she didn’t know were waiting beneath the surface.  Never in her life had she been so desperate for any contact, even if it was just their pointer fingers crossed while they sat on the couch and talked.  And she didn’t just want to be held, but she wanted to hold him too.  She loved laying there with his head on her chest and her arms holding him tight.  She loved being the big spoon and getting to nuzzle her nose into the crook of his neck.

With him, she wanted to be sensitive.  She wanted to be loving and cutesy.  She wanted to be able to easily express her emotions, not keep them boxed in and have difficulty voicing them like she always had in the past.  While she wasn’t quite there yet, she still had insecurities from her past that kept her from easily telling him how much she adores him or that she loves him so or even just what it was about him that made her so happy, she was committed to working on that.  She knew that she would strive to tell him all the things that she felt inside, all the things that she would appreciate if they were coming from him.  She would make him feel cared for, and most importantly, she would make sure he knew that he was loved. 

And if in the end that’s not enough, at least she did her part and never left anything unsaid.  That was all she could push herself to do because if he left her tonight, or anytime in the future, at least she would have always reassured him of what he meant to her and she wouldn’t have to wish she’d said anything.  Everything would have already been laid out in the open.

She pressed a kiss to his bare chest, making that promise to herself right then and there.  She would tell him all the things she felt inside as they popped up, no matter how hard or nerve-wracking it was for her to speak the words.  She would make sure he knew he was loved. 

Reviews

[Brandon Wernke]

Good story. If only all thought that way, at the end haha. I enjoyed reading it.

[Elanna Lillian]

Thank you so much!