REPROBATE!

 

 

An example of emotional excrement
A burn in the fabric of time
You're pure objurgatory condemnation
that berates the innocent mind
I can't quite understand you
and I really don't care to know
For you live in perjurious shadow
where no truth or love can ever grow

 

A perversion to the meaning of honesty
You claim that "It’s all done in fun"
You're never slow to speak in anger

Loudly flapping your unbridled tongue

 

Sadly I can't really hate you
For I try to walk in the light
To live my life in honesty
Doing all that I know to be right

 

You're a deceitful reprobate

A miscreant scapegrace wretch
Violating the peace of the innocent
like a Satyr pillaging a Lech

 

Well maybe I do understand you
better then I did before
You are just a filthy disgusting reprobate
Who desires the world to be its w***e!

 

© 2012 Eddie K. Phillips

Author's Note

This is a poem about how people hurt you and then pretend it was never personal. Crazy but it happens all the time. People violating others to get off.

Reviews

[James Hanna-Magill]

Dear Eddie,

I am pleased to say hello and to pick this piece to review first. I like your profile. I see much of its spirit in me.

Style: Much to say. There is a richness and a depth to the language you use. A few words lie outside the normal use, except perhaps of those with a certain education, and may therefore may make it less accessible. But then I have never objected to using a dictionary when younger to educate myself, though these days I do not often need one. The benefit of being a fifty-something, perhaps?!

With my apologises to anyone who reads this who feels this comment is misplaced.

But the richness of your vocabulary lend it colour:

'objurgate'

'berate'

'perjurous'

'Reprobate'

'miscreant'

'Scapegrace'

However, I am a linguist by background and in all humility may I point out that your usage and spelling in one or two cases is at least theoretically incorrect.

'Objurgate' you use as an adjective. It is a transitive verb and means 'to scold'. I think you may be better off with 'abject'? Please feel free to correct me if I am wrong. I am not hereby claiming to be God's gift to linguistic usage.

'Perjuous' I think you will find is missing an 'i' and should be spelt 'perjurious'

I really do hate acting as a grammarian in my review of pieces. I feel like I am picking at tiny detail, whilst it is the whole effect of the piece and its content is really all that matters. I feel it's like killing a flea and in the process the beautiful creature it insignificantly inhabits!

Content: The subject of the piece and the anger that it expresses at users, who blithely run around destroying people's happiness with jibes, insults or even greater crimes I admire.

The tone of complete outrage works well. I can feel the moral indignation.

There is no rest to the imagination. There is no balance or measure to it. There are softer ways you could balance it. But why should you? It's a deliberately well constructed rant.

I very much liked this poem, its richness, its moral content and look forward to reading more.

I hope my own comments on your grammar are correct. However if they are not and you have just cause for using them (American and British English do not always match!) I apologise. At times making up your own words or indeed misusing them can be an effective way of getting a message across.

Should you find any spelling mistakes or errors in grammar in this review, I assure you they are entirely due to my own ineptitude.

Thank you for sharing this lovely piece which I admire.

With all due respect and my warmest regards

James

[Eddie Phillips]

James I appreciate the review. I took no offense to anything you wrote. I am willing to make any valid accommodation you suggest. I did leave the "I" out of perjurious. Thank you for catching that. Objurgate should have been objurgatory in the poem. I thank you also for catching that error. Your review was spot on and I thank you for the honesty.

I am a strange writer. I write, copyright, and post poems without looking at them again for weeks or months. I miss errors like these at times and I thank you for turning my attention to them.

[James Hanna-Magill]

Dear Eddie

Thank you for that.

I hope I have helped.

I like your writing already.

I shall be back for more!

Best wishes

James

[Eddie Phillips]

James I wanted to tell you that this was one of the best reviews I have had on this site. I wanted to thank you for that.

[James Hanna-Magill]

Eddie, my entire pleasure, your friend, James