Lost On The Path To Nowhere

On the outside I put on a smile,

A smile for everyone else to see.

I want everyone to think

I am put together, happy, and know who I am.

Inside I am falling apart. 

I know what is wrong.

I know I am nowhere close to happy.

 

I have no idea of who I am.

I know who I used to be, before I fell apart. 

I know what I should be.

I know what I want to be. 

I am not any of those.

I am just a lost soul. 

Lost on the path to nowhere.

I have a single person to turn to,

but I do not know how.

 

Inside, I am constantly crying.

I cry. 

I ache. 

There is little happiness,

And almost nothing brings any.

I used to be strong, happy, loving, 

Sure of who I was.

Sure of what I wanted. 

I am not what I once was.

I am weak, lonely, and fearful. 

I put on this mask of happiness 

For everyone to see,

And it works. 

They think I am okay. 

They think I am happy.

 

I don't want to bother or worry them. 

So I get up in the morning, 

Sorrow for just a moment,

Then put my mask on, 

And smile a fake smile.

If you look closely,

you can see,

there is no light left in my eyes,

No ray of sunshine,

To share with others.

This is me, 

But only for now. 

I have to change. 

I can not live like this, because this not living.

Author's Note

When I wrote this I wasn't writing it for it to be a poem, or for anyone else to see. I wrote it because these are my feelings. This is my life right now and I wanted to write it down and organize my thoughts. You can see my original, which isn't as much of a poem as this one because of the formatting. I have arranged this version to flow better, and to make certain parts stand out to readers. Reviews are always welcome!

Reviews

[Eagle Cruagh]

Dear Elizabeth,
This will probably sound weird------ what is right,
more chit-chat, or the truth ?
-----In your mind you create the world-----Buddha.
Remembering that---you create your world, turn to others
the people that you would like to see happy
Make an effort to understand those people, make them happy,
even if it is only a smile. Sometimes a smile can change the
world, it has for many people.

When you have made others happy, take a look at you ------
You have created a new world, a world of your making and
you will be in love, in love with your world.

Thanks,
---- Eagle Cruagh

[A. Amos]

Love the title and the content of your poetry was great...

[Richard]

this is really beautiful and candid thank you :)

[MoriartyMesa]

I read this like an old bit of Mississippi blues. The emotion needs the halts and breaks in pattern, more blues than poetry, be proud this was smart work and soulful work.

[MAC]

a brilliant display of your honest emotions....and that is what makes it poetry.

[deaths calling]

i liked reading it

[keyvan]

this is awesome.....thnk you....:)
I'm new...please read my poem and give your idea about it....

[poetry-kiddo alienbaba]

A diamond in the coal are you.
The kernel in the code...if i may say so too..
A change is coming forth, a resolution true.

[junaid altaf]

but there is always this somewhere and something!!
well penned....

[elizasexybeth]

I felt very much like this once you have explained very well. It has a lot of emotion. Id like to say to you there is light at the end of the tunnel life is not made to be stuck in a moment like this there is always a better way out there and I hope you find it.

[Elizabeth Carter]

Thank you! I'm trying to remember that.