Sacrifice

I look like I am here.

My eyelids shutter-click
your face in frames per
second:    your lips quiver
as you stare at me.

Did I mention that I am nude?

The clock you bought
from the gypsies scratches
at the bedroom air.

When you kiss
me and I kiss back,
I am not here--

my skin is, my heat,

I've left everything
here in this moment
for you--
            even my pulse
I once held so tight,
            like the lake clings
            to the moon.

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I think the concept is one many of us has felt...I know that I have. Giving yourself to someone, and yet being disconnected from the act due to circumstance or situation. This is a painful place to be, to sacrifice ourselves for the pleasure and appeasment of another.

The thing that really sings in this piece is the imagery...the clock section was very nice, but I truly loved the ending, "like the lake clings/to the moon." Despite the fact that moon imagery tends to get a little overused in poetry (just read a paper on it actually), I'm still a big fan and use it often myself! Beautifully done!

[eglantine]

Yes, but I can't help myself to using the moon. Glad you enjoyed it and thanks for reading

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Oh, I do it as well...at least twice in the last three days. I just keep coming up with new ways of inserting her into my work with stealthy resolve... ;)

[Pete Langley]

Yes, our bodily responses can often be divorced from our inner selves, can`t they?....in love as well as in living. "....like the lake that clings to the moon" is a wonderful line to end on. P.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

wow this is heavy...i am going through the motions...either you aren't really with me when you are with me...or i am no longer here except physically..

"did i mention that i am nude?"
great line, as if the other person wouldn't even notice that because he is so self-absorbed...and hardly pays attention to the speaker even as he makes love to what he thinks is her...little does he know..that is just a body, a shell...and emotion as left the building.

wonderfully penned piece, as usual from you.

[ChemicalMadness]

I could write a lot about what I love here....eyelids shutter-clicking, clocks scratching, moon's clinging.....and I would be justified. But what I love the most is the way you draw me in. It's a lonely moment, this moment you've invited us to...there's so much vulnerability....but you gently let us in, allowing us to enjoy the phrasing and delight at the imagery....but it's the unspoken, the formatting, the in between - which plays so well with the spoken (I love how "i've left everything" hangs so heavily there on its own) you never disappoint.

CM

[Dana Alsamsam]

giving yourself up to someone so fully and truly that you seem to lose yourself within the moment, or within your lover. this is a hauntingly beautiful tragedy that you've wrapped so wonderfully in your words. my favorite section being:
"The clock you bought
from the gypsies scratches
at the bedroom air."
beautiful articulation of the heaviness and irritation of time, especially in romance situations. i love this piece very much! great work.

[Melobldnfr]

My heart stops with the line: "The clock you bought
from the gypsies scratches
at the bedroom air." I absolutely LOVE this image! Thanks so much for sharing! Xo.

[eglantine]

and thank you for reading

[Justaguy]

Awesome poem! As you probably know, I like romantic and erotic writing. The subtle way yours reads is amazing! Loved it.

[eglantine]

Merci! Thanks for reading

[I Shred This Cabbage]

stunning. absolutely stunning!!

[eglantine]

Thank you John

[Leslie Philibert]

This is confessional poetry ( I read the expression, and I like it) a la Sharon Olds or Sylvia Plath, brillantly written. Great.

[eglantine]

:D I love Plath! Thanks for reading Leslie

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Sharon Olds is great too, egglantine...check her out if you haven't already.

[icelandicblue]

There are times where there is so much that we can give, especially if we are losing ourselves. We are creatures of compartments and sometimes we've to disassociate to survive. A well written poem.

[eglantine]

Yes, disassociation is a coping mechanism. According to a past therapist, I would often do so. Thanks for reading.

[icelandicblue]

I think it is something we have all done one time or another.

[Simon Welsh]

Love it. Attachment is a funny thing.

[eglantine]

thanks for reading