Secrets

Internal dialogue is often best expressed.

They chose a gravel bar,

the one where they first made love.

It was good then.

But that’s a secret.

He faces away from the smiles.

A log is floating slowly by.

He hates his bow-tie.

But that is a secret.

The water keeps flowing.

He feels he’s flailing, 

a drowning man in a river of confusion.

But that’s a secret.

His level of commitment oscillates.

Being unwed is not so bad.

He begins to wonder if he could just run.

But that’s a secret.

The small crowd sings a hymn poorly.

He focuses on two butterflies.

The preacher drones.

He’ll keep his secrets.

Reviews

[Melanie Genevieve]

This is so cool. I really enjoyed this poem, the repeating lines, the theme, everything :D

[imawriter]

Ah the secrets we all keep. I love this poem==especially the last stanza===thinking of butterflies while the preacher drones.. hmmm.. seems to me maybe the butterflies' message from God was better one eh? :-) Keep up the good work

[Rick Puetter]

My Dear Papaed,

You would never know that this is a poem for a contest. This is done in a masterful fashion. I congratulate you. You have made this so poingiant. Going through with the marriage, keeping his secrets. We all go through life keeping secrets. (Why am I trying to explain this to you!!???)

Very best regards on an excellent write. Very high marks!

Rick

[Helen Crutchett]

Wonderful submission to Tovl's "Ten". I loved the "secret theme" running through it. An intriguing and well penned poem. ~ Helena

[Jenny Nelson]

I really like this, especially the repeated last line of each stanza and the slight variation to it in the last. Really gives the piece a definite feel that conveys very well. Clever use of the words; they fit so smoothly.

[Tovli]

loved this, really nice. tovli