lies of sound

goin

what do you really hear

not what you hear

but what im tellin you

can you hear the pain

the pride

the words that you read

sound just like lies

a book

a poem

its all just crys

i practice not to fumble

so i never drop my y's

all about brain

so ill never not be wise

time to hear life

but do life hear time

aint no fear in my life

but is there fear in my time

one day its gon hit me

and ill be laid on the ground

so before that s**t happen

let me get to know sound

 

 

 

Reviews

[No]

normally i have a problem with people using coupleted and irrhythmic rhyming but as i read this piece i noticed that it flowed much better than i originally expected upon glancing at the opening.
and i must applaud you because of it.
one small problem i encountered was the fact that some of the lines wouldn't assimilate themselves in my head and i couldn't quite put the words together into a complete thought. perhaps a point of reference to remember in time.
you definitely have potential, and i look forward to reading more of your work.

-mary jane

[ruth]

i really like this, it flows smoothly and everything about it is just great.
i really like how you started
"what do you really hear
not what you hear
but what im tellin you
can you hear the pain
the pride
the words that you read
sound just like lies"
great writing!
-ruth

[Steve Thompson]

hahah this is a irrhytmic piece with a flow to it, you have now been awarded the poet award!!!
This is crazy how you connected everything together...unique and fresh to read....orginal...you never hear much about that anymore!!!

[No]

oh and ps. i really liked the title. :)