Pressure Senryu

Where two diverging systems meet

Spring is in the air,

Winter remains in my heart,

Looks like a storm front

Reviews

[Blue]

Your best senryu yet, I suppose. I adore the line "Winter remains in my heart." I'm proud of your progress, Eddie. Keep up the good work!

[Eddie Davis]

Thanks, Blue, you are very kind.

[Dhaye]

For me, it can be a Senryu since you are referring to pressure which is also an emotion. But it can also be a HAIKU, since you mentioned about seasons in the lines....regardless of the title.

Nice job again, Eddie.

[Eddie Davis]

I had heard of Haiku in High School and probably have written one years ago, but if this one was a Haiku, it was an accident, believe me. Thanks for your kind words.

[Frieda P]

Works for me.... Sounds like a high pressure front fast approaching. Nicely pen'd Senryu.

[Eddie Davis]

I'm not sure about line two, I thought it had too many syllables, but according to English dictionaries, it is correct. I don't think this Senryu would work in Japan, though....