Aidan-Prologue

Prologue

                Aidan was lying in his bed trying to fall asleep. For some reason that night he just couldn’t get to sleep and he had been having a terrible feeling that was happening all day. Aidan felt like something bad was going to happen during that specific day. Aidan didn’t understand what was going on because he was a six-year-old boy.

                Earlier in the day Aidan was playing in the backyard. His mother was watching him from the lawn chair with a smile on her face. Aidan had a feeling that something bad was going to happen to his mother every time he stepped near her. Aidan ran away into the kitchen to get something to drink because he was thirsty from playing. He also wanted to get a drink for his mother as well.

                Aidan ran back outside and gave another glass to his mother who smiled at her young son.

                “Mommy, I got you some water,” little Aidan said. His mom, Ashley, took the water from him. She placed a hand on top of his head.

                “Thanks honey,” she said.

                “Aidan, can you come help me,” his father, John, called. He motioned Aidan to come over to where he was standing. Aidan ran over to John. John handed him a bucket because he wanted Aidan to help wash the car.

                “What do you need help with,” Aidan asked John although Aidan already knew the answer to that question.

                “Can you just hold the bucket for me,” his father asked him.

                “Yes, Daddy,” Aidan responded. Aidan held the bucket while his father worked on his car. Aidan always helped his father when he washed his car. Aidan was used to the routine by now. John didn't really need to ask Aidan because he would help anyway.

                When Aidan went inside his mother was making lunch. Aidan looked a little down when he walked inside the house. Aidan had another feeling like something bad was going to happen.

                “What’s wrong, Aidan,” his mother asked him noticing that he looked pale and a little depressed.

                “I just have a really bad feeling is all,” Aidan said to his mom and she smiled at him. Ashley hugged him trying to reassure Aidan that everything was going to be okay.

                “Awe, honey. Don’t worry nothing bad is going to happen,” she said to her young son and planted a kiss on his forehead.

               A couple of hours later Aidan drifted to sleep. Aidan needed sleep for school because it was starting tomorrow. He woke up again because of feeling he was having again. When he woke up, Aidan, was thirsty again. Aidan decided to go get a cup full of water from the kitchen. When Aidan entered the kitchen he saw his mother lying on the ground not moving. He ran over to her.

                “Mommy, mommy,” he said while shaking her. Ashley still wouldn’t move. Ashley was lying on her left side so he couldn’t see her face. Aidan moved to the right side and he saw his mother had blood all over her motionless body. Aidan started screaming because he saw Ashley's blood splattered all over the place. Her blood was splattered all over the floor next to him and the walls and other furniture. Aidan noticed all the stab wounds that were placed all along her body. Ashley had more than one stab wound on her body.

                When John heard his son scream he came out of his room. Aidan was still screaming when his father had walked out into the kitchen.

                “Aidan, what’s wrong,” John asked his voice was filled with sleepiness.

                “M-mommy is d-dead,” Aidan stuttered. John looked at his wife’s body. He was in bewilderment because his child was right. His wife was dead and John couldn’t believe it. John held his crying child tightly because they were both really upset. John called the police a few seconds later. The police showed up and so did a forensic team because his father reported a murder. John didn't really know if it was murder he was only taking a guess.

                Aidan was disturbed because his six year old mind couldn't handle anything like this. Aidan was too young to comprehend what was going on.

Author's Note

This is my pride and joy. I need to work on it. Make sure all of the grammar is correct. So I am reediting to make sure that it is. I hope you can bear with me. This isn't my first time editing it, but I really want it to be ready. I love this book. It's the first book I have finished. I am going to be working on the second one as soon as I finish editing this. When you read it. I hope that you enjoy this novel. Thank you for supporting me for whoever actually finished this story.

Reviews

[Maksim T. Siggurd]

Not bad, but as an honest critique and not as a slam here, but in my personal opinion the word "Aiden" appears a bit much. If you establish the character who is thinking/doing/speaking/whatever and it doesn't flip-flop back and forth, a lot of those "Aidens" can be switched to "he/him".

You don't have to take my comment to heart, but as a writer who had my early pieces destroyed for doing this, I just thought I'd pass along some friendly advice.

As far as the story itself goes - so far so good! I'll keep reading. If you get bored, check out the beginning of my book "Republika: The Fierside Massacre". Good work!

[Trevor]

Definitely a great way to build up interest for the rest of the story! My only criticism is that in a few places the wording somewhat detracts from the flow. Other than that, however, great job, and I can't wait to read more!

[Sseoni]

I love this prologue! It really makes you think "What happened?". Intriguing beginning so far! I can't wait to read more and find out what happens. :D

[Luna Northstar]

Awww, poor kid. I feel so bad for him... I wonder where this story will go? I mean, was it murder, or, something else???? I'm so curious!!!!! PLEASE keep me updated!

[Shin]

Awesome! It's like the poem, but full in story mode, I'm craving for more!