How to Fish (A Short Story About Helping Others)

A Story by dw817

You are Hanging wallpaper in your kitchen and your friends come by to watch. Then they start giving you all kinds of advice on how to do your job even though they've never done it themselves.

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HOW TO FISH

HOW TO FISH
A short story about helping others ...

* * *

This story is rated: EVERYONE

I think we've all been there.

You are hanging up wallpaper in your kitchen on any given Saturday afternoon and your friends come by to watch. Then they start giving you all kinds of advice on how to do your job even though they've never done it themselves.

And just how are you supposed to react when they do this ? With appreciation ? Yes. Yes, that is what you are SUPPOSED to do, but suppose you don't ?

Suppose you tell them in no uncertain terms that they are in fact, NOT helping one whit, that they don't have a clue what they are saying, and that you can do it on your own ?

Well you may very well break up a friendship or worse, and for what ? Pittance. Pure pittance.

Well, let's get started with this story shall we ?

. . .

This is a short and simple story about a young farmer, a good one, named David, who wants to start a new trade, a little fishing. Now he has seen other people fish, has tried it himself with little success, thus he feels he needs some help to figure it out.

So he invites all his friends, three guys and a girl, to the local tavern and promises drinks all around, if only they can teach him how to fish. With the opportunity of a free cold pint, they all eagerly show up and are equally eager to show the receptive farmer how to fish.

At first they are all laughing and talking to each other around this long circular table. Cheers and huzzahs are heard in appreciation for the free drinks.

Finally David clinks his glass with a spoon to be heard.

"Thank you, friends." he starts out. "I've gathered you here today because I would like to learn how to fish. I've tried in the past and was not successful. What am I doing wrong ?"

There is a moment of silence and he continues, "Now then, who would like to start ?"

After another moment of silence there is suddenly an eruption from the table as everyone tries to speak at once.

The farmer clinks his glass again, "No no. That's not going to work. You - " and he points. "Yes, Brenham, my good friend, what can you tell me about fishing ?"

Brenham nods with complete sincerity, "That you have to think like a fish."

"Excuse me ?"

Brenham puts a hand on either side of ears and flaps them in and out while closing and opening his mouth in an alarming display. He does this for a full minute.

David speaks, "Anything else ?"

Brenham shakes his head, "No, just that. Remember that. Learn to talk and communicate with the fish and you WILL be a perfect fisherman."

David pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Fine. That's just - fine. Okay, next, yes, let's go clockwise. Mervyn."

"Mervyn ?"

"Yes, I'm here."

"Well ?"

Mervyn gets serious for a moment. "It has to do with the stars, friend. If you look here - " and he drapes a long star chart across the table, at least 4 feet in diameter. As if this isn't confusing enough, it is clear he has marked several points with different colors of ink and made swirls with arrows pointing in all possible directions.

Mervyn speaks addressing the group, "You can see here, where the nebula enters the goat's mouth. Now this is only good if the sun is seen in HALF. For you should know that there is a magnetic pulse emitting from the sun during this time that causes the bottom molecules of the fish in the sea to rise to the surface."

There is a deathly silence around the table. Not even the sound of disconsolate murmuring.

"It's all explained here - " and Mervyn hands David a rolled up scroll.

"Also understand that the goat's mouth changes to the chicken's lips every other week when the sun descends to the North."

"North ?" David asks. "I thought the sun rose in the East and set in the West ?"

Mervyn scoffs angrily, "A lot you know. Trust me - follow THIS and follow it WELL and you will have no problems. You will be the greatest fisherman anyone will ever know."

Whereas David's forehead pinched in pain earlier, now it felt like a tight vise was scraping against the inside of his eyelids. "Movement of the stars." he said sourly.

But Mervyn was nothing but thrilled to hear this. "Exactly !" and he laughed friendly. "You see, it's not that hard to figure out. You'll understand it in no time at all."

"Next !" It sounded almost like a plea for mercy. David looked to see his 3rd friend around the table as Mervyn sat back down. "Diedra."

"I'm here." she said.

"What do you have to offer ?" David asked.

"I have a gift for you." she spoke, and whereupon presented a beautifully wrapped present.

"For me ?" David was beside surprise.

"Yep, just for you. Should cover everything you need."

With growing hope, David pulled open the wrapping to reveal a beautifully leather-bound book. He turned it around in his hands, even the pages were gold-etched. Beautifully emblazoned on the cover it read, "Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Fishing."

"Wow !" David's eyes lit up, realizing someone had finally given him a decent answer to his question. "This is - " he laughed, "incredible. Thank you. Thank you so much, Diedra !"

Diedra got up from her seat and went over to where David was and gave him a nice and friendly hug which warmed David up all over. His face pinked up by her closeness.

She grinned broadly, "I'm so glad you like it. It's all explained in the book. Everything you need to know. These - " and she grunted waving her hand like she was shooing flies, "other - people really have no idea how to really fish."

She took the volume from David's grip. "This book is the way. Read it, and all will be revealed to you."

"I just wanted to say thank you again, " David breathed out. Then with excitation opened the cover to read. But - something was wrong. Not only was the book not in English it didn't even use English characters.

He started at the book for a moment, then it sunk in on him.

"Chinese !?" he squealed in frustration.

* * *

Diedra was still by his side, "Yes, dear. Of course ! They truly are the very best fisherman. You just have to read their words to learn their craft."

"But - " David blubbered in disbelief, "I don't - I DON'T SPEAK CHINESE !"

"What are you saying ?" Diedra asked, kindness now leaving her tone.

David shook his head, slumping back in his chair. "I - can't use - this ! What !? You expect me to learn the Chinese language first JUST to learn how to fish !?"

Diedra then stood up on the table angrily and leaning over faced him, not remotely concerned all the guys behind her could now clearly see up her hand-sewn flowery skirt.

"You MORON !" she yelled crouching over and reaching for the top of David's hair, pulled on it. "I gave you the answer. And you're not satisfied with it ? You're a total ingrate, you know that ? A complete MORON ! See if I ever help you again !"

With that she pulled forward, her fingers still wrapped around David's hair and thumped his head soundly against the wooden table.

Now while earlier David thought he might be having pain in his head from the previous 'solutions' from his friends, now he REALLY did have one. He pulled away from her grip and massaged the front of his head with a brisk hand.

One of the guys unable to contain the excitement from what he was seeing being behind Diedra on all fours started to sing off key, "I see London, I see France, I see someone's - "

Diedra whirled around suddenly to face him with a look of menace that could freeze a raging bonfire.

"Tell me what you see !" she demanded, leveling her burning coals of eyes over his terrified face.

His voice took an uncomfortably high pitch, "I see - someone's underpa - I mean - someone is - very - ahhm - angry - right now - maybe ?"

Diedra growled and reaching around punched him hard in the nose. He was hit so hard that he fell back in his chair and slid out from behind it.

Everyone was dead quiet now. Diedra got off the top of the table and smoothed down her skirt. Then she stormed out of the tavern in a huff.

Only one person remained. David groaned, perhaps more in the misery of knowing he would never learn how to fish more than the bump on his head.

"Alright - umm - yeah, it's - Peter ?"

"That's me !" he said cheerfully standing. As he did everyone else groaned.

"What's wrong ?" Peter asked, truly hurt by the negative reception.

Brenham spoke first, "He doesn't know the first thing about fishing !"

Peter crossed his arms slightly amused, "Which to you is - to communicate with the fish first."

"Yes !" Brenham said nodding his head vigorously. And to demonstrate he put his hands back on the sides of his ears and - well - made like a fish again.

"Perfect." Peter said acridly.

"That's not the scientific approach." Mervyn scoffed, eager to join the fracas.

"A lot you know !" Brenham countered. "Unless you think and talk like a fish, you will never be able to catch one !"

Mervyn waved one of his scrolls, "These stars tell me when there is a climactic shift of gravity on the planet. That's the perfect time when you can catch them !"

"You're full of chicken and stars !" Brenham said and rose from his chair, eager for a fight.

"Fish stick, you're going down !" Mervyn said tossing his scroll aside, ready for a brawl.

"David ?" a quiet voice addressed him.

"Huh ?"

It was Peter. "Come on, let's get you started."

"Started. Started how ? Don't you have some method you want to explain to me."

Peter shook his head.

"No method of communicating with the fish ?"

Peter shook his head again.

"Doesn't have to deal with tracking the stars in the sky ?"

Peter smiled now indulgently, clearly it was not.

"Nor trying to learn a foreign language ?"

Peter answered this by silently rising from his chair. Whereupon he took David's hand in his and set out to leave the tavern as Mervyn and Brenham spoiled for a fight.

"No, it is none of these things." Peter assured David.

David shrugged, "Well, what is it then ?"

"Example."

"Excuse me ?"

"Example. I am going to teach you how to fish by example. Talk is cheap. Actions are much mightier than words. Anyone can talk you to death and run rings around Saturn in their explanations, but if they can't actually DO it themselves, then they really in truth don't know how it's done."

"I don't understand." David said, starting to feel confused again.

"Fishing is no great trick." Peter told him. "You need a pole, fishing line, hook, and bait - and really that's about it."

"What about thinking like a fish, or reading it from the stars ?"

Peter grinned, "Who knows ? Maybe those methods might actually work. But I doubt it. No, the best way to learn really anything is by EXAMPLE. Find someone who has already done what you are asking and LEARN entirely by their example."

"Not what they say but what they DO ! Actions will always speak louder than words. Oh - and make sure the answer they give you is in the same language you speak."

David hadn't been paying attention to where they were going. In a short time they were at a fishing pier.

Bundled up in the branch of a tree was a folding fishing pole and a tackle box made of beautiful mahogany.

And for the better part of that day, evening, and till red glow in the morning, Peter taught David exactly how to fish, entirely through example. No mysticism, no trying to learn a foreign language, and no blowing something out to epic proportions for the mere sake of a simple task.

Because teaching a man to fish does not necessarily means that you are always just baiting his hook. No, but it does mean you will have to give him a fishing pole and show him - quite simply how to fish, as other people have done throughout the years. It's that simple.

. . .

So what can be learned here ? That any person can easily give advice about something he knows nothing about, and feel rebuffed when it is not accepted.

Others still can give advice but couch it so deeply in technical definitions that it would take years for the learning party to understand something that should only take mere minutes. And also feel resentful and angry when they are told quite simply their explanation is too complex.

Others still might throw a lazy finger or even a half-chewed bone at you, but still not really solve the question or problem you are having, and getting mad when you tell them it is not enough.

No, it takes great consideration, determination, and kindness - never forget kindness - to SHOW someone how to do something. Not all wrapped up in methods you know for a fact that the person asking hasn't a clue to understand.

Nor a solution given in a foreign language or definition where it is quite clear their question is written in a native tongue - simply expecting a native tongue answer.

No - EXAMPLE. Teach by example, actually DO IT. And people really will understand you, appreciate you, and look to you for future help and assistance.

. . .

Now, this story can also be easily related to computer programmers, possibly helping one another - and maybe they aren't - not really.

For instance, if someone asks a question in programming and writes the query code in one language, that does not invite you to give a reply in a completely different programming language. No, that is not at all helpful to them, not unless they stated beforehand that they are intimately familiar with that other language - and in most cases, they don't.

Or to rub salt in the wounds and tell them they have to learn the new foreign language to get their answer when it's clear a great deal of study involving weeks of complex and arduous work will be involved to answer their question that only takes a few minutes were it answered properly the first time.

It's also not very useful if they are asking for something simple and you direct them to a generic page that might as well try to explain quantum physics to hamsters but actually reveals no easy answer to their simple question at all. Sure, you can laugh about it, but that's very mean to do to others, and also once again - not very helpful.

It's also not good and it really is rather rude and poor taste when you toss someone a bit of the answer they what they want, but then withhold the rest, sniffing disdainfully and telling them to solve it on their own with the promise that they'll be a 'better' person for it.

I don't know what kind of game you lot are playing at but you know VERY WELL that is also not at all useful.

And not only is this demeaning and degrading to those people who politely ask for your help but can even deter them from wanting to learn the programming language in question with all the runaround you give them.

And what kind of person does that make you out to be when you act like this ?

While others may not be aware of this inside joke you all collaborate on, I most certainly am - and am calling you out, to be a better person and ACTUALLY HELP people when they ask for it, and on the level they are asking for, not above - and not beneath - just right on the same level.

Some of you already have and I am very grateful and proud that you are doing so. You others who make it a head game where utter frustration of the one asking is the goal you have in mind - and you know who you are - this story I wrote is for YOU.

Questions, comments, compliments, or kerosene,

lemme know in the comments !

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Reviews

Kari Rakitan

This is an awesome story. It reads like a parable from the Bible. I like how it puts everything in terms the average person can understand.

Posted 3 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

3 Years Ago

Hi Kari:

* It might actually be pretty interesting to convert this story to one of Ae.. read more

mg44

I really enjoyed your short story, and having worked in both avionics and software engineering I personally do try to show by example as opposed to giving a small piece of the jigsaw puzzle.