Tossed Away

I sit among lost memories of the life we could have made-

Shattered by unwillingness, stubbornness, and shame

I feel you at my fingertips then swiftly wisped away

Knowing so little about you breaks me into pieces

Your inability to care for me should be enough to boil my blood

Yet strangely my heart still yearns for you and what we could have become

 

You held me once so sweetly, while whispering in my ear

The feelings that you had for me deep inside your soul

So strong they were, so full of emotion-

But only one look from her turned them upside down

I’ll never comprehend the irresponsible choices you made

To cling to a stranger and leave your only one in tears

 

To walk away from that kind of greatness is beyond ignorance

Beyond all imaginable reason and forgiveness I will say

How could you, I dare ask-

Just abandon part of your own being

Blood, flesh, the heart that pounds inside me

All half yours- in part your creation

 

Wasn’t I worth enough, intelligent enough, good enough?

How could she fill my place in your arms?

Her little beasts that call you daddy-

They don’t share your genes and name like I

How could you cast off the daughter that loves you

I never gave up no matter what you said

 

One day you’re time will reach its end

With unfinished business you will ascend-

To greet the maker of all who roam the earth

What will He say when the book is opened to your page?

Are you good enough, smart enough, worth enough to be His child?

Or will he simply dismiss you and walk away?