camping

The June Bugs were conjuring the solstice to life. I was walking the sunset home for the night, going deeper and deeper into the woods. I had a sense that I was getting lost, but was getting used to it. I had been camping the last two nights alone in the deep woods, looking for u.f.o's , the Bigfoot and firefly trees. I was to be getting back to my car, but my feet had other ideas. I felt as though I was going deeper inside of myself than I ever have, the further into the woods I walked. The amount of firefly's became greater, the June Bugs buzzed louder and seemed to be synchronizing. I walked further and further and the woods became thicker and darker, I had no plan but felt strong, as the forest devoured me.

I arrived to a small clearing that was made clear by some strange source of light. I had a sudden cognitive dissonance and felt the air change. I paused a moment, and noticed no fear in myself, only wonder. I pushed forward towards my beacon. I felt a warming and a since of whispers around me. "We shouldn't fear ghosts." I told myself I was brave and I was, so my feet carried me with strength. It was almost completely dark and a full moon pierced the high and tight knitted branches. I approached the clearing ahead and walked through a small opening made in a dense line of trees, as If it had been made for me. I walked through it and my soul began to burn.

A perfect fire was sitting not forty feet in front of me behind the line of foliage in this new found clearing. It was perfect. All of the logs stacked in a tee-pee shape, with lush thick flames licking this air. I inspected the area around me carefully expecting to see someone, but there was no one. Not only that, but there was no gear, no other logs or seats or anything. Just a perfect fire. I was sure if I waited a minute someone would arrive, I didn't have to wait long until another part of this scene seemed to pump all of the air out of this small clearing. The dirt around the fire was so fine and delicate, almost like sand, it seemed to sparkle all around as far as the fire would illuminate. The thing was, there were no footprints around the fire, not one. I walked around the entire thing and could find even the smallest bit of movement, it was thoroughly undisturbed. I bent down to make a mark in it and just and thought, found it perfectly easy to leave one, and it stuck out like a crater on the moon. I knew it wasn't a good idea to lose my head this deep in the woods so I just sat down and took off my backpack and watched the fire. I hadn't a clue what time it'd been since I'd gone camping and just relied on the changes of the day, by now I felt that I was beginning to understand that the changes are the only real time, and when things stopped changing, time would stand still. 

I thought about where I was, how I got here, and couldn't shake the feeling that someone was expecting me. Or had been anticipating my arrival here. I thought about the fire, and how there were no footprints, I thought about ghosts and Sasquatch. It started to feel like it was my birthday, and that this fire was like the candles on my birthday cake, and that everyone was expecting me, or waiting for my arrival. I watched the perfect fire licking the air and tasting everything around it.

I watched that fire for what felt like an eternity, and I promise you that it never moved, it never burnt down any further, it stayed that perfect even flush and pulse of destruction. Its as if the wood had made a deal to sustain the fire for ever if it would never destroy it. It was like watching god and the devil coming to terms with one another. Its the kind of miracle you never get a chance to fully get shocked by, because by the time it gets there, you've already imagined it enough, like watching clouds break apart. I pulled out my sleeping bag and didn't even bother setting up a tent, the air was still, mosquito-less, and perfect. I dreamed of whole new worlds that night, and woke up the next morning. The fire was out and there were no signs of anyone, so I gathered my things and walked out of the woods and came back home.