Leaky faucets. Leaky facets.

Leaky faucets. Leaky facets.

A Stage Play by dukovan

Plumber enters the bathroom occupied by a spastic french homeowner named Linguini holding a pickaxe and ducttape, with sidewalk salt spread across the floor, sandwhiched between two towels.

Linguini: It is about time!

P Well shoot mister, not a lot of time in between what it usually takes to get here went by besides the time it took me to get here, mister.

L: In the time it took you to say that nonsense the space between the floor and the ceiling has shrunk. Significantly!

P. Well excuse me there mister but I don't see the point in arguing it none. Shoot, in the time it took you to spell out that there fancy muli-syla-ble word, it woulda' done be on its way to being solved.

Linguini - you one-dimensional creature! by the time it took you to spit out that nonsense, I could be giving my poodle a bath. you wouldn't know a crowbar from a hammer

Plumber- Excuse me mister by I don't take kindly to insults . Ive been a plumber for generations in my blood, my daddy, and his daddy, its in my arteries mister, i have plenty of experience

Linguini- You wouldn't know up from down!

Plumber- I'm multifaceted!

Linguini stares blankly in disbelief,

Plumber: I mean faucet-ed!


This went on for the next couple of hours or so. Needless to say they both drown, including the poodle. Linguini had left the water running and didn't realize it so he stuffed towels in the door causing the bathroom to flood, the plumber had stood in the bathroom the whole time upon entrance, closing the door behind him and putting the towels back where he found them. In fact, they argued whilst completely submerged in water, it is unclear who got the last word in.
"

© 2013 dukovan


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Added on October 26, 2013
Last Updated on October 26, 2013

Author

dukovan
dukovan

Oconomowoc, WI



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A Poem by dukovan





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