France.

My first play.

Act 1-
Ludvig: Clara my dear, where is the coat I got you last week?

Clara: Oh...well I meant to tell you about that, I lost it in a game of black jack after I was cleaned out.

Ludvig: You lost all of your allowance? How could you be so careless? That's the problem with people today, they can't allow themselves to benefit off of other people. If its given to them they can't appreciate it.

Clara: Well its hard to hang on to money that I don't work for. You know I have a gambling problem, and you're the one who won't let me work.

Ludvig: It is 1822 and I am a French Nobel, why on earth would you be working?

Clara: Me and my servants have been talking...

Ludvig: (Interrupts) here we go...

(sinister stare from Clara)

Clara: We've been talking and I'm coming to the conclusion that I am my own person and am capable of making my own decisions.

Ludvig: Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

Clara: So I've decided I'm moving in with Sir Cambridge, he and I shared a lovely evening in which he told me I should have more fun in life and be more selfish. I agreed. He played me soft mandolin, and read poetry about absinthe and the female form. We laughed about sweet nothings in the moonlight and drank Pinot Noir.

Ludvig: What?! I'm shocked! Utterly stunned! You went and did all this without telling me you had a problem first?! I could see if you were to tell me and I reacted poorly, you would then make the decision to do something so rash, but to not even give me a chance. That's the problem with people these days, they have no faith in anyone else.

Clara: Well what about you? You don't even understand you're double standard right now. Otherwise I assume you wouldn't be doing it. You have such an ego. I'm sick of your head taking up all the pillows.

Ludvig: You know I'm sensitive about that.

Clara: You're too sensitive, you don't control me because you want to, its just the only way you can pretend to feel good about yourself.

Ludvig: I could have you beheaded.

Clara: Sir Cambridge wouldn't like that

Ludvig: I could have him beheaded.

Clara: Then we will be beheaded together. It would be very poetic.

Ludvig: I could behead him and lock you in a room with his head.

Clara: Could you explain that to your mother?

Ludvig; My mothers been dead for six years.

Clara: Well what about your evenings every Saturday with Madam Mandolia, has your mother been telling you anything worth while?

Ludvig: Don't mock me Clara, Mandy is a sweet woman and excellent clairvoyant. She channels the bridge between us and the afterlife.

Clara: Then why does she forget to wear a bra.

Ludvig: She see's past the that sort of thing, its part of the clairvoyance.

Clara: (Stares in disbelief) what point are you trying to make right now?

Ludvig: That I'm right.

Clara: You're problem is you'll believe anything you want to hear. You'll never have any clarity that way. You'll never see your true plan.

Ludvig: Don't talk to me about a plan, you're the one leaving on a whim, on a feeling that makes no logical sense other than biological triggers and urge's. You need some self control, you need to think about things, you don't realize you're hurting me. If you ask me this entire thing is ridiculous and immature, I can't wait to tell my mother about this on Saturday.

Clara: Tell her I say hi.



Ludvig storms off exits into the bedroom and throws all of Claras' belongings across the living room. Clara sits stone faced grateful for the help. It was the first time since their wedding night that Ludvig did anything for her in her mind.

Scene end

Scene two:
Blackened stage illuminates to a dimmed cafe where Ludwig is sitting talking to Francisco, a Spaniard who had a great flamboyant impression of an exercise machine. This would make for an excellent conversation starter and great cardio.

(Story idea)
In an experiment gone wrong, a group of rouge treadmills become animated and unanimously decide to run people over.

Ludvig: I don't know what it is Francisco. You give the girl the money and time to get away. Give her freedoms and space, and what do you get in return. A slap in the face and lies. That's whats wrong with people today, they always need something wrong. They always have to pick out some detail to devastate themselves with. Where is the honesty? They're fooling themselves if they don't think this world is beautiful just the way it is.

Francisco: My friend, didn't you just throw your absinth in the servers face last week because one of his hands was smaller than the other.

Ludvig: My point exactly, people are just so inconsistent.

Francisco: I suppose so.

Ludvig: Every time I want to talk to her, its like she's already anticipating what I'm saying. There's no room for me to try to change, or explore myself sexually. Take for example, about a month ago, Clara and I were trying to get intimate. It had seemed like a chore for months at this point, so I come up with the creative idea to go get a helium tank to lighten things up. You know, just really try something exotic.

Francisco: How did it go?

Ludvig: Well we were laughing at first at the absurdity of our pitch, but it all went down hill when she inhaled too much and she floated to the ceiling. She said afterwards she wasn't in the mood and had a sore neck.

Francisco: I think you need to stop worrying so much my friend. Give the girl her space, maybe you'll learn something about yourself, dream the whole thing up again, and then, when you are burning with desire, find her and take her, and make love to her as if you have never known love before.

Ludvig: That's easy for you to do, you're a Spaniard, I just don't have that sexual stamina.

Francisco: You just don't know it yet.

Ludvig: Maybe not, well it was nice talking to you. Same time next Wednesday?

Francisco: I'll be committing suicide next Wednesday, my love has left me for another.

Ludvig: So why next Wednesday?

Francisco: I need a week to see if I'll change my mind.

Ludvig: Well I could try to move around my schedule for Tuesday