It all remains

song

I'm building sand castles in my brain

as the tides make pools with the moon.

I saw your eyes fill up

as you learned everything will spill.

 

Your innocence is aiming up

and it shattered across the sky

creating every star.

Each one was made to die.

 

My kingdom came in waves

like a dream I didn't save.

So I left the plans

on the bedside

to write down when I awake.

 

I need a miracle

to swim through my veins.

Between the crash and the remains

it all remains.

Reviews

[Sami Khalil]

I like this poem. Well penned.

[Allycat]

I loved the imagery and metaphors you used in this! It's very creative :)
"Your innocence is aiming up
and it shattered across the sky
creating every star.
Each one was made to die"

wonderful job

[eglantine]

I adore the first three stanzas but the last one seems too rushed and in a hurry for a conclusion. There is a lot to be explored here. Love the 3rd adn 4th lines, heck that whole first stanza is beautiful. thanks for sharing!

[Mia]

I can appreciate this poem but I must admit I think you've done much better with others.

[joshua deathdealer]

This is a brilliant piece. I felt every bit of this man. Excellent work.

[Kelsey]

I always enjoy your work, but I particularly enjoyed this one. I love the comparisons you use, the word choice, the setup, the flow- it's all beautiful. Great job. x