To gently put it...

To gently put it...

A Poem by Dr.VonFrie
"

Its just an angry poem about a few people in my life

"
I speak with a sarcastic tounge
a serpant tailing every line
the ironic taste of my own thumb
as i remind you of your childish cries

you are the jester to my king
you are the half payed mexican
you are a ginger without a soul
you are everything i know

your lack of inteligence
it was spewed upon the first page
your entitled to your own thought
but your opinion is of that i scave

you are the caustic lies
defication to my mind
a dreaded path i turn
when i follow your every word

your verbal inebriation
is enough to cause a dui
i swurve out of the lanes
missed the exit to my own mind

© 2012 Dr.VonFrie


Author's Note

Dr.VonFrie
This is actually written originally as a song.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Well Dr. I could feel the fusation in the poam. Like you wore dealing with some one ,who had power, but no idea where you wore coming from. I'd be entressed to hear what it sounds like as a song, But you had some very strong moments there.
Take care and good luck with the book, I wouldn't worry about what people like to read, Most are sheep and well read what ever on the top selling list.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Well Dr. I could feel the fusation in the poam. Like you wore dealing with some one ,who had power, but no idea where you wore coming from. I'd be entressed to hear what it sounds like as a song, But you had some very strong moments there.
Take care and good luck with the book, I wouldn't worry about what people like to read, Most are sheep and well read what ever on the top selling list.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very interesting. Nice writing overall!

Posted 11 Years Ago


very nicely written. flows well, and i really like the way you described these people. very creative imagery. a lot of clever lines here i really enjoyed.

Posted 11 Years Ago


I'd be interested in what the tune of the song is. When I read poems (admittedly not particularly my genre) I always try to pull out a word or phrase that I find particularly clever for later. "Your verbal inebriation" is a really good turn of phrase.

Good writing sample.

Posted 12 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

298 Views
4 Reviews
Rating
Added on December 12, 2012
Last Updated on December 12, 2012
Tags: anger, hate, closure, help, sad, poem, gently, inebriated, serpant

Author

Dr.VonFrie
Dr.VonFrie

Philadelphia, PA



About
Ive been writing since about the 6th grade. It started with essays and raps then lyrics, poems and finally short stories. I am currently working on a novel but the inspiration to keep at it has grown .. more..

Writing