Heartache (part one)

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An orbit rests in time when you rewind another tear
Despite my past that’s gone at last I now need you to hear
Standing up straight before I realize I’m on the floor
Got the world on my shoulders but I’m still asking for more
Every tear I’ve shed has bred a frozen heart now dead
Instead of counting sheep in my bed I pull the sheets over my head
Its hard to see the light when there’s a shade across your eyes
Given every gift in the world but I still find myself deprived
I’ve got the heart of a warrior in which no one can withstand
I’ll brake out both your knees and then I’ll order you to stand
Standing under headlights as I look up to find a star
The sounds are found of many but I’m alone inside my car
I’ve got a story in my head but the pen hasn’t moved that far
The air is thick enough that I cracked it with a crowbar
Peel off the blind so I can look you in the eyes
Because the room is always darker when the sun and earth collide
Up and running before he could even crawl
Weaker then the opponent yet still looking for a brawl
I’m lost inside my head because I can’t read any street signs
The directions seemed so easy but its impossible to find
Mind full of confidence running like he rules the city
Now he’s locked up for life because the courtroom found him guilty
I’ll take a moment to live, but I’ll live for every moment
Cast down from above like a juror giving judgment
Center stage, fire ablaze, I’m a sideshow named pathetic
So I’ll rip my heart apart and let the others now dissect it
Outside looking in, these walls prevent me from reaching my mind
The door in front of me is locked and the key I cannot find
A fully loaded pistol is passed around a circle for Russian Roulette
Televised suicide with the background music of a drum set
Like a freight train with a blood stain I can see it barreling through my head
I’m hanging on to the rope but all that’s left now is a thread
Straight jacket with a brain bracket as I scream all through the night
I know I’m never wrong but my answers never seem to ever be right
Your eyes are bountiful with flowers, rainbows and sun showers
Sunsets on the beach warm water and light towers
My minds deserted, empty plains that are black shirted
Ominous skies, thunder storms with black holes inserted
Sleep deprived from seclusion with a wit to scared to make an intrusion
An empty handed attack because reality is slipping into an illusion
I tried to fly on wax wings but they were heated to the extreme
The plummet to the ground didn’t do much for my self esteem
I took a blow to the chest just to see how much I could sustain
Even though his fist never landed I could still feel all the pain
I’m hiding underneath your nose because I’m an unusual suspect
My actions are clearly obvious but not one of them can you detect
I set landmines and barbed wire so I’ll never lose this moment
Standing as high class but I’m still looked at like a rodent
I have all the time in the world but I’m still sitting and counting the minutes
Already collecting the prize knowing well that the game was never finished
I said I’d be by your side from now till the end of days
But you died long ago and all your blacks faded to grays
I have holy wine in my mouth and gods gift inside my palm
Drowning in his blood as you yell out to stay calm
Hands reach out and start grabbing my ankles from the grave
I try to remain calm but in my head I know that I’m not brave
Space may be the final frontier but it’s made in a Hollywood basement
Left on shelves behind closed doors like a distant constellation
Through glazed eyes and heart bound lies you can see the monster
Known the man for all your life to find out that he’s an imposter
A mouth already quite but told to stay in silence
Stands in the corner with shadows forming an alliance
Intellectual science that silences every moan
Found safety in my eyes but not in my own home
Tally up my score with hopes of light and angels wings
Feet atop the clouds with sounds the angels sing
The perimeter is tight and in my heart I know something isn’t right
The sun is overhead but I’m still drenched inside the night
The picture you took of me is no longer in the frame
I know it’s all your fault but I’ll still take all the blame
You insert another quarter because you feel the need to play me like a game
Like I’m a pet inside your house that your at the moment still trying to tame
I keep you at a distance but your voice cuts me like a blade
The sun is always out yet I’m always found around the shade
The temperature is slowly rising but my blood begins to freeze
I try to stand up tall but I blow away like a paper in the breeze
The pain is to intense so I drop down onto my knees
Projected on the wall I light up like a movie screen
I’ve never been a rebel I’ve just been one that falls in time
I’ve never had it in my hands but still I’ll say that it is mine
They put me in a tunnel and I saw the white line
But I turned around and walked into the darkness of my mind
I stand fully erect with the moonlight gleaming through my eyes
As a new part of me glistens a stronger of me dies
I’ve never been a man of my word but I’ll still give out a promise
I’ve never told the truth but I’ll still swear I’m being honest
Their muttered under my breath but their impact hits you like a brick
You might be made of muscle but I’ll snap you like a stick
Searched for centuries now to reveal a hidden story
Once found and read aloud the world quickly found it boring
Challenge your retina and dive face first into the blurry past
Your wining every race but your car is always stuck in last
I thought you’d eventually catch on for my lies keep repeating
I told you to close your mouth but you continue to keep on eating
To you I might seem transparent but on the inside I know I’m disturbed
I constantly scream out for help but my words are never heard
The worst mistake you can make is to take me on my word
Its like dropping all your weapons and then biting down on the curb
Revenge is a state of mind, musically refined to cause chaos
Like a reaper on a holiday sent specifically to slay us
I aspire to be a legend so I can create a true original style
Hopefully fast enough to be pulled away from my FBI file
Clear across the news with a headline named psychotic
Wings painted black bearing a voice known as demonic
No use for superstition like a bible with a curse
Cracked open a fortune cookie that said I would save the universe
Like a bedtime story my life has manipulated into fiction
I’m sweatin and twitchin like I’m trying to fight off an addiction
Muzzle the motor like a mouth that can not speak
Strong enough to brake the world but he died for his heart was to weak
As much as I want to grab it the image is merely just a display
Like a mirage off in the distance, betting on a game I can’t play
Head for high water or duck and run for cover
Barrage of bomb blasting besides below we cant discover
Most qualified for the job but they wont make me a leader
They asked for a knife but I handed them a meat cleaver
Above expectation but the result quickly becomes tragic
Dying from a heat stroke like you were left up in the attic
Survived an attack that nearly made me decapitated
Blood drenched the monkey wrench that’s tightened and laminated
My hands are burned from the stove but I’m still yet to touch
Scorched from the flame like a devil with a lust
Life changed ages ago but I’m still unable to adjust
I’ve known you for my whole life but in you I still can not trust
Passed on into the afterlife but souls are still stuck in the skies
Gospel with his words but all he does now is spit lies
Confusion is no illusion it’s just an arrest of the cardiac
My heart left my chest in hopes of finding a better habitat
With a life set to deformity and a power so formidably
I’m left alone inside of a village in hopes of finding a new community
I look up into the night to see that every star is now shining bright
Waiting to throw down with the sun but it loses each and every fight
I huddle not only for warmth but for safety found inside of numbers
Lightning rips the sky but what really bothers me is the thunder
I speak motivational words but I’ve already lost sight of all hope
Traces back to my genes inside of my DNA code
I’m as tranquil as they get but I’ve given birth to pure insanity
I feel the wind blow my hair as I’m jumping off of the canopy
The sun is blaring overhead but all I ever see is black
The weight is light as a feather but I buckle under the impact
Doomsday has arrived and the diagnostics have been prescribed
Its an exhilarating ride of everyone of my fears intertwined
Desert of quicksand, I’m doomed, and I can’t remember why
I’m the toughest man in the world but all I ever do is cry
I try my best to leave my life inside of Gods hands
But just like last time I found myself on the floor again
The men in my head are slowly dying but the war has never begun
Hit the ground from the bullet but it was never fired from a gun
I put the past behind me but I’m still unable to overcome
Million dollar man but he lives on the streets like a bum