Grey Grace

A poem about a woman/girl that is suffering with the consaquences of blind love.

The grey sky

is holding every lie.

She wants to die.

 

The water is grey too;

waiting to devour something new,

watching tears fall from her eyes so blue.

 

Was she meant to jump?

to fall to her watery grave?

It seemed so, with her life so alone.

 

 A cruel wind came,

whipping her hair, calling her name,

saying,''Your death will give none the blame.''

 

Ah, but the truth she knows.

His essence is as black as the crows.

She now reaps, what he did sow.

 

Innocence lost,

at her own cost.

Life; now colder than frost.

 

But her babe calls.

Catching her; before she falls.

The Penalty of Guilt polls. 

Author's Note

Asusuall, let me know what you think. REVIEWS!!!!!
And let me know if' I should add on to this. :)

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I believe need more description. Last lines left a open door. The poem was strong in description and story till the surprise ending.
"But her babe calls.
Catching her; before she falls.
The Penalty of Guilt polls. "
I enjoyed the darkness and the desire of this outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Brandi Nicole]

i can feel the sadness. very good.

[Blake]

Really great job! The imagery and emotion were all great. The combination of the two made this a very great poem. Good job!

[Aly Jones]

Whoa. This is just amazing! Even though it's a poem, it felt like a story with how I could picture it.

[trish420]

Good Job!!! So relatable and moving!

[paradise]

beautiful Poem It is amazing and hgas such a geat meaning to it even thought its sad its true and real amzing piece of work

[Richard Anthony Goulart]

This poem is downright unbelievable. I loved it and am astonished at the feelings that I felt while reading this piece. A truly magnificent job that you did on this here piece. Congratulations are long over due for this. Good Day!!!!!!! :-)

[Legacy]

dreaming dame,

A bit of mystery helps the reader to process their own thoughts... Let not any additions stand in the way of this.

Matter of fact the poem is nearly perfect because no one can ever change the feeling you had while you created it. At best, we can offer some grammer or spelling opinions.

In which brings me to this:
"It seemed so, with her life so alone."
(I would definatly take out the second 'so' on this line.

Right now, this is all I would see that could make it better.

Thank you for sharing your poem with us.

Have a wonderful day,

Legacy

[sugar]

nice write

[Just Me]

this was a seriously deep poem! I'm so glad she was saved but on the other hand if she's in a blind love wouldn't it be better for her to not have been saved. Anyway great poem.

[ब्र&#..]

such a great poem!
alltid
-Meja