Chapter Two: Werebadgers

Edward Jacobs’s adventure began on a faithful night when he was alone playing World of Warcraft and heard a sound outside. He ignore it till his battleground was done then he went outside and looked. That was the first time he actually had the balls to do something that was scary. He went to a slightly moving bush with his Captain Planet tee shirt on and the warm pee of a caffeine filled night running down his leg. He touched the bush and a small black badger nibbled his finger. After days and the full moon setting, he turned for the first time… into a badger.

“So really a badger?”

“Yes, Thomas. For like the five hundred time.”

“So on a full moon, you turn into a small innocent badger and probably dig up people’s garden. Oh you bad boy.”

“I’m not innocent. I once turned and attacked a little child.”

“Lemmie guess, the kid just kicked you and you ran off.”

“I’m going to sleep.”

I laugh and he turns to the window. I turn to Olga.

“So you never told me what you are.”

She giggles, “I’m witch.”

“Oh nice. Most girls I know are just b*****s.”

“What are those? A type of witch?”

“Oh wow, you must not be from around here.”

“I’m not. I was raised on a farm in Pennsylvania.”

“Interesting. So where did you meet the furry warrior over there?”

She giggles, shes falling for my charm already. “One night I went outside to see what was attacking my crops. And there he was, eating away. Then he turned to attack me and I used a spell to stop him from attacking me. In the morning to my surprise, he turned into a man. We talked and then later we ended up dating.”

I pretend to dry my eyes, “What a beautiful story.”

“Thanks.” She smiles, believing me. “Well I think I want to get some sleep.”

“Me too. Night.”

“Night.”

I get comfortable in my seat and start to drift into sleep but suddenly I hear the baby crying again.

I yell out. “CAN SOMEONE MUZZLE THAT BABY? OR KILL IT? WE ALL KNOW THAT THE MOTHER HAS THOUGHT ABOUT IT A FEW TIMES.”

Reviews

[Morrigan Nicole]

The werebadger part about killed me.

[StarNinja]

Jesus, he's even worse in this chapter than the last one. I thought, "maybe I was too harsh on this guy. Maybe he becomes a likeable figure that learns a valuable lesson about humanity and about himself." But no. Chapter 2 is just as short and Scotty is still an a*****e. I don't even know why I hate him so much. I just do. God damn, there's ten chapters in this book? F****n A*s...

[A.E. Surdam]

Edward Jacob - twilight. Funny. It's getting good. I find it light and humorous