Two Minutes Ago

Overwhelmed at my response to a week filled with disappointment and startling truths

On bended knee I crawl
Blubbering like a three year old
Desperate for relief from the exhaustion
That steals from me any hope of rational thought

Blood dripping from my fingers
Staining my prints into the floor
Yet I continue
Gathering up the shattered pieces
Of my existence
As if I could patch it back together
If only I could find every shard

I don’t know how this happened
Two minutes ago I was smiling, laughing
Taking up the intoxication
of how well I had forged
Through the tar and feather
Of a life so far from storybook
That most of you think I am lying

I had gathered around myself
The sweet warm cinnamon scent
Of a home I had blueprinted
Under my eyelids
And carefully sculpted
Until now

Two minutes ago
 I felt the pull under my heels
Though desperately I grabbed the air
For that single grounded truth
It vanished

And I would rather
Bleed do death in the attempt
To find every last bit
that once made me whole again
Than close my eyes tonight
And see who I really am