one two (palomino)

written january 16, 2013....

I step

   one

      two

toward the edge

and carefully tilt my head

'I can do it'

and move back

breathe deep

   one

      two

and rush

Holding hands with children

on slow walks through school playgrounds

keeps that desire leashed

-- he wants to go and climb the ladder,

down the slide, once steel now

dull plastic,

into the sand

That invades me, too

a forward motion

always a forward motion

   one

      two

haltered by something bigger that

pretends to know more than me

it's a moment of faith

and a moment of sickness

I pledged with you under the palomino sky

to future wounds, to future healing

But where are you now?

I fear the great horse in the sky has taken you beneath the earth

along with the sun

Singing songs before bedtime

summarizes the day as another page

just turning in a larger volume

-- this voice is the thumb on the page

as the light's switched to off

We go our separate ways,

for a moment is long enough to sever completely

every connection

   one

      two

and I feel a sense of loss

as I turn away

I step

   one

      two

something breaks under my foot

I know the fantasy of being a hero

I can barely catch my breath.