16 - 14/01/18

dom circa 2014

Throw up feeling and memory, 
just to swill round the mouth 
and swallow back again. 

Careen into the road in sick-splashed daps 
and let the bodies that barrel me 
back to pavement pile up. 

Let men manhandle; 
fly off the handle 
at the inevitable chorus, "too much to handle". 

Lie because I'm beaten, 
lie that I've already eaten. 
Embellish my story or steal someone else's ... 
Only do it because I'm compelled to! 

Pull up close to the mirror, settle in. 
Pull back skin and study - 
cheekbones, irises, and chin. 
I don't know who she is. 

Scream into unbearable, immediate presence; 
regret. 
Disconnect. 
Nothing to feel if nothing's real.