The Gift of Second Life

Story of Hope and Optimism

Taking chances the gift of second life.

Tragedy, catastrophe and misfortune that’s how I describe my present situation of my continued journey here on earth. 1st one week of my recovery I was emotionless and didn't take current circumstances seriously, well maybe because I was not well informed with my current situation. Until I got interested to know about my condition, questions are popping out of my head Why? How? And When? , Three questions that when answered could hopefully make some clear and vivid understanding.

Turning point? Yeah it could be, but in my 24 years of existence I have lots of mistakes, lapses and unwise decisions that have been made. I marked these as the most dangerous and breathe taking part of my life, though I didn’t felt the harm and vulnerability of my condition because I just bear and tolerate the pain, on the other side I wonder what if I just took my condition for granted, worst case scenario is death.

“Ectopic pregnancy” the doctor said, sounds familiar I heard it when I was in high school in our biology class. But due to time length I already forgot what does it mean, I asked the doctor and of course I got the very clear picture and detailed explanations from her. “Surgical operation” she said, ahmmp let me think about it. But it’s so ironic because I don’t have time left to think and say no, coz it’s urgent! I will wait for tomorrow or my life will be in danger. So I have to say yes for the operation ready or not or else I will be dead, gkkk tigok! Sounds so horrible right? It doesn’t end there, so insensitive that me? Myself? Doesn’t really care so much with what happen to me the past 6 days from the time I had my surgery. Until such time I begin to ask these three questions, I don’t know if makes sense to you, but for me it does. So my stupid cupid questions are WHY I am experiencing this thing, this EP thing. I believe I’m a good person so HOW did I get these abnormalities on my reproductive organs? And WHEN I could be pregnant and have baby again? It sounds so weepy and emotional, right? (Teary eyes)

In many cases not just sometimes I could hardly identify right from wrong. Because for me as long as you could support, uphold and make stand on your decision from wrong you can make it right. I don’t believe in karma on the other hand I believe everything happens for a reason and that reason is either teach us or to prepare us for something that God had planned us to be and to do. Positivity!!! Something good will happen. So why God let it happens? Because something good a waits for me ahead.

People around me especially friends knows how I boast about my health, “I’m healthy I know that because I never got serious illness in my entire life” my line before whenever we talk about health conditions with my friends. So how did this happen to me? According to what I’ve read, because I do some readings and browsing about this condition, thanks to google anyway J there are numbers of causes and reasons why woman tend to have this condition. And yeah I likely agree some of it. So I should say I’m not that healthy like what I’ve always thought before. Well, so much for this unhealthy thing, it would be better if I’ll took this scientific churvah studies and explanation just right on the side and let my own opinion be on high light, spot light, flash light, series light and what not. So how did I get this? In my own bright and clever opinion, I acquire this kind of abnormalities from vices and wrong doings. Wrong doings? Common guys don’t get me wrong here, all of us have our own wrong doings, but making it so detailed may harm my privacy. So let me leave it that way. Hungin’ but please don’t hung yourself. Kidding aside, in any case I believe I am destined to get it through.

Uncertain, indefinite and unsure, answers to the question when I could be pregnant again and have a baby, I only had 1 tube left. Again I believe in all possibilities. I know it could not be easy but I only need possible I don’t care if it’s hard or difficult. In God’s time, God will provide.

Along with life experiences every part and portion of it teaches and reminds us always that there is God who always there give us freedom and respect our decision, teach us how to do wise decision, guide us to the right path, carry us when we are weak and catch us when we fall. What happen to me opens my mind into reality. Realities that hidden and covered with denials long time ago, that now finally open to accept possibilities of lost and found. Lost something we want and we loved. Found new beginnings and hope that someday great things will happen, in time.