The War of the Blood Brothers

In the Kingdom of Vitalia a new conflict rises.

It was the stinging cold of winter that made men feel mortal, an unavoidable sensation when facing icy winds and chilling snow where one would barely feel his feet sinking. Even the scattered trees stood merely as frivolous witnesses to the passing of the most cruel of seasons. Only the landscape of the world remained nearly continuous in form and content, maintaining intact the structure of it's hills and riverbanks. The time of the year simply affected the overall presentation of the scenery; water would shift from frozen to liquid and trees could go from aching with cold to burning with fire, if the summer proved itself a worthy rival to winter. Nature only preoccupied itself with it's own dealings and resolutions, and what man did with the soil provided was ultimately of no relevance.

Amongst the distinct topographical features of the landscape a particular set of geological characteristics formed a valley where, at the center, resided a typical isolated medieval Inn Further away from the Inn, from both sides of the snowy valley, two small groups of men riding horses in opposite directions descended symmetrically towards the wooden construction, each party seemed to be led by one particular individual. Upon the simultaneous arrival at the Inn, both men instructed their crews to remain outside while they entered through different doors for a long awaited conversation.

The two men fixated on each-other while a short but seemingly long distance separated them from the far stretched corners of the room and the polar opposites of their values. These men were once friends, companions, but in the midst of the unfolding of their lives the connection so strong between them was severed by man's undeniable animal nature when confronted with an intrinsic inability to come to terms with the truth. One can only conclude that so vehemently denying the most truthful of essences may provoke a shattering effect that even the strongest of minds fail to avoid.

After briefly staring at each-other and reminiscing on everything that took place so that this situation became possible both men proceeded along the room towards an empty table at the center of the room. Somehow, a random location chosen with no careful examination for the meeting revealed itself oddly magical, in a sense that the two of them felt like they were the focus of an entire audience, despite no one in particular in the Inn even noticing their presence. As they approached the table a tension began to rise within them, the candles and the fireplace that lit the room seemed to narrow their perspective on their movement. Although no person, either costumer or worker was paying attention to their internal squabble, yet all their conversations felt unimportant and distant. The only thing that mattered were the two men walking to a confrontation, the weight of their bodies cracking the wooden floor as they moved, and their dancing shadows predicting the coming of dark times.

The table had been reached by the two. The one that came from the right sat himself on the respective chair, but the one from the left decided to remain standing, gazing with a serious but blank face across the table.

" Waitress ! - shouted the one sitting, with a coarse but firm voice " One beer for me and another for my.. partner.

He looked defiantly in the eyes of the man that once was his best friend, his chest bursting with a feeling of superiority, as like the only thought in his mind was of death.

" Have a seat, Heidhal " pushes the chair in front of him with his leg " you have accomplished a great journey, you must need some rest.

His expression of sadistic sarcasm was subtle but evident to anyone who knew him.

Heidhal, after scrutinizing the chair he would sit on, did so almost reluctantly. To shed any glimpse, however unreal, of weakness or obedience was an error he could not dare to commit. Too much was at stake and too much strength and resolution he needed to sway his former companion away from his quest. Still, he remained silent.

" Nothing to say ? - a daring question met with a silent answer from Heidhal.

" As you wish, I can sit here and expose my intentions all the same, I don't need your a*s-licking small talk to explain myself. As you well know, I have but one goal; to eradicate the foul leaders of our country and seize control of it. An elegant and straightforward plan, I know, if it weren't for your troops blockade on the Western Front. Now, the reason I asked you to meet me here in this establishment which none of us controls is only one: I am here to advert you, not to bargain my surrender. I do this because of the friendship we once held and what that memory represents to me, yet it won't change my terms. If by nightfall of the next Silver Moon you haven't retreated your troops from the Western Front, I will not hesitate, not for one moment, to unleash the full strength of my army upon your encampment. I promise to slaughter every man, wounded or mangled. And I assure you, after that I will ride to your dear Wyrnstead and I will kill every woman, every child and every moving being that crosses my path, and when I burn the city down, nothing else will be left besides the ashes of your servants and the memory of your failure.

A profound silence between the two men was established. Heidhal struggled to maintain his composure and his adversary followed an equal procedure of restraint. A fight involving the two of them meant total war in the kingdom.

Heidhal, conflicted, contained his words, he couldn't let his emotions speak for him, and the climate was too tense for him to bring reason to the table. While he pondered on what to do faced with the threat of total annihilation of everything he cherished, his adversary stood up and uttered his sentence.

" Heidhal... I wish your head wasn't as thick as the Yesperyn Mountains and you could see through the blindness of your ingenuity. I don't want to do the things I said but I will do them if you don't surrender, the fight I'm waging against our false leaders is too important and I will let nothing stand in my way. If you are unable to defeat your pride than I have no other choice besides crushing you and everything you hold dear. I will make of you an example of the kind justice my rule will uphold. We will see each-other on the battlefield.

As he turned his body around and started to walk away from the table, Heidhal stands up and finally opened his mouth.

" You speak of justice while desiring to wage war on innocent people. I see it differently. I see a man so consumed in his thirst for power he imagined a whole argument to why his actions are just and to why his rule is more valid than the current one. I see a man that turns his back on an old friend after threatening him, his family and his people. The man I see in front of me is not the man I grew up with. The man I see in front of me is not the man that took from his own belly to feed those who were hungry and in need. The man I see in front of me is not Kovak, and he is not my friend.

Kovak stood still slightly further from the table. For a few seconds his mind wandered between past and present and his body tricked him, but then he straightened his back and cleansed his mind of doubts.

" Defining our leaders as innocent is a proof of your ignorance. These are the same men that brought war to our doorstep and the disease that followed. Their irresponsible behavior left our land scarred and our country crumbling, and now you tell me I am deluded? No, I am not deluded ! My vision is clear and so is my purpose, I see a future where this country will be great again through the grace of my rule and all of those who try to stop me from making things right will fall before the power of my belief. And so shall you.

With an hint of disappointment Heidhal uttered his answer.

" Then you are truly lost. If I have to go to war to stop you from destroying our country so be it, but I will not let your clouded sight point the way for further darkness. You chose to blame our leaders for the war and I swore to protect them from any harm, and I will uphold my vows and what is right, and when the day is finally over I will burn your body and mourn your death while knowing I did what I had to do.

After Heidhal let out his final word, both men stood for a moment gazing through the other's eyes, seeing their past together, their present separation and anticipating the darkness in the future before departing in opposite directions towards the long wait before one of them met his end. Only then, could it be over.

Author's Note

Any reaction would be appreciated :)

Reviews

[Archos]

At first the 'sterile' and logical style of writing did not feel right, but eventually it worked with the topic and setting. (the way I see it, you took a creative risk and succeeded) I like the grim stmosphere and the gravity (sometimes scenes like this one tend to be a bit naive) This chapter is great, but it could be even better. You should definitely split it into paragraphs (it makes text much more pleasant to red) and the thing I mind the most is the 'false leaders'. It is a plain concept, without anything interesting. It feels a bit lazy. :D It doesn't feel natural and I just don't like it. I would prefer to read about something new. I've heard many stories with false leaders. (that does not necessarily mean they can't be false, just try to give them a more original characteristic, or at least call them differently, please? :D ) However, seeing that things aren't just black and white in the end was really nice. I liked that. Thanks for sharing!

[John C. Chill]

Well, my writing works as my mind works, logically and objectively, I just can't work in any other way. To be honest, the idea of false leaders wasn't my favorite either but I realized it worked well as a catalyst for the struggle between two men. In the end, it served to show (like you said) that nothing is ever just black and white through two different interpretations of a common situation. Everything else in the story swirls around the conflict of these two men, that's why I didn't develop anything else. Also because it's just a short chapter for a short story.
Anyway, thank you for your criticism, I will keep your words in mind :)

[Archos]

The idea itself isn't bad, it fits the story. Its presentation is just too plain and raw.

[Krizito]

War between friends...life does have it's unique perks. The dialogue was awesome_strong and to a point. Your painting of imagery, quite distant from what I've been used to. This was impressive_really supercharged.
spoiler: I do Heidhal beat the lights out of Kovak.

[John C. Chill]

Thank you very much ! The ending will come soon, but it will have a bitter-sweet taste. :)

[Krizito]

*fingers-crossed* Can't Wait!!

[Mister T.]

First of all, this is an amazing story, I just had to say that :)
This story contains a lot of messages and life lessons. At least, I recognized a few: "Power makes monsters" and "friendship is the most powerful weapon" for example. Did you mean to implement these in your story? If yes, great job :)
Besides that, I can really imagine the situation they were in. They once were two friends, two allies, but as their lives unfolded, they grew apart. Now they're facing each other once again. I could really feel the tension of the conversation. Besides that, you didn't even have to describe the two men, their personalities became clear as they spoke. Great job on that!
I spotted some minor errors while reading:
- "his back and and cleansed": I think you should remove one 'and';
- "Only then, will it be over": "Will" indicates a present tense, but it should be in a past tense, as the rest of the story is also written in a past tense;
- "With an hint of disappointment Heidhal utters his answer": Same as before, the tense of the verb 'utter' should be the past. Besides that, it should be 'a hint' instead of 'an hint', as the H can be heard in the word 'hint'.
Other than that, very good story! Are you planning on continuing this story or making another one? Just curious :)

[John C. Chill]

Thank you so much for reminding me of the errors ! I hope the "only then, will it be over" is actually corrected. I'm not a native English speaker so I make certain mistakes, mostly with verbs.
My objective with this story was to show the fracture between two men, so I tried to get inside the mind of both of them. All they said was "felt" so there are clear messages about life and humans in general.
After the overall good reviews I decided to continue the story and end it properly, the second part is already out, the third is coming soon. I also felt a need to end it, an itch on the back of my head. :D
Thank you again, my friend :)

[Mister T.]

Guess what, I'm not a native speaker either ;) But I'd be pleased to help you out with grammar. I, too, make mistakes, it's okay. You learn from your mistakes, don't you?

[John C. Chill]

Yes, that's the way it goes :D

[TheMalady]

This is so nice and intense. Thumbs up. The emotions stirring between the two old friends now turned enemies are flowing smoothly through the plot. It's just so amazing how you could put their ideals and perceptions altogether. Awesome write, btw.

As I read throughout the story, I noted an error. Just one:)

- I don't want to DO the things I said but I will do them if you don't surrender, the fight I'm waging against our false leaders is too important and I will let nothing stand in my way.


I think you missed this one. Overall, I liked the story.

-Keep writing :)

[John C. Chill]

Thank you for reading and reminding me, the mistake has been corrected :)

[TheMalady]

You're very welcome! Glad to help you out! :)

[Solar]

One is drawn into the story right from the start - the harsh weather and landscape, the groupings of figures, the zooming into close-up of the two friends turned deadly enemies. From the dialogue between the two the reader learns more about the past and the present events which will give rise to a destructive future - the tension remains, as the two men confront each other, moving towards the inevitable. Both characters are presented in such a way that the reader can empathise with their points of view.

[John C. Chill]

I am thankful for your review, it proves that my objective was accomplished :)

[Solar]

You are welcome - looking forward tp more!

[Zyle Christian William ..]

How chilling!
Both in your description of the weather and the tension you amassed between them! I couldn't stop reading not even for an instant and I had chills reading the whole time! Kovak's words so filled with rage stirred me to rally for his purpose but then Heidhal's words brought reason to the table and at once I felt a remorse and a burning in the back of my eyes as i blinked away looming tears to continue reading. This is such a painful situation that I can relate to all too well. How tragic this must be that friends come to this, I also enjoy how you describe their entrances and develop their personalities with only action! THERE IS NO OVERWHELMING DIALOGUE or even you telling us what each is like, you let each man show us what they are like to inform our decision of who is right. You do a wonderful job narrating the story with a non bias. I know it will bring me pain to continue reading, but I want to, I care about these characters that much! Victory or defeat, I know it will be tragic no matter what and that is what makes this a beautiful beginning to an otherwise glorious tale!

[John C. Chill]

When I wrote this I didn't really think I would give it continuation, but after reading your review my heart filled with passion. This story will be continued in the most grand way I can find. Thank you again Zyle :)

[Zyle Christian William Cook]

John I am so excited to see where you take this and honored that I could be an inspiration! Happy writing! You have great command over the craft!