Untitled

Untitled

A Poem by dillonjensen
"

Just a thought floating in my head.

"
Let's give it up
For the man with the slowly declining mental health
He writes these poems to maybe reach out to someone going through something similar
He knows what it's like to be completely alone
Unable to talk to anyone
Because who would listen
In a world that can't stop talking
So that's where he comes in
Almost like a big brother
He's been where you are 
He's currently living it
And wants you to know you're far from alone
You subjectively experience it by yourself
But many people experience the same thoughts and feelings too
They just have a different lens to look through
-@dillonleejensen

© 2017 dillonjensen


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Featured Review

Dillonjensen What a very poignant poem, I like the way it flows and its structure. Having had to deal with many case of dementia the way you have worded your poem does you credit. The one failing is I am not a fan of your first line "Let's give it up". I have always associated that with a round of applause (for a man with mental health problems?), I am sure that is not your intention. Would you consider a different first line? To me you have the answer underneath your name "Just a thought floating in his head" fits in so well with the flow of your poem.
Edward (hedgehog1)


Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dillonjensen

7 Years Ago

Wow! Thank you for your kind words and review. I think with the first line my intention was a play o.. read more



Reviews

Dillonjensen What a very poignant poem, I like the way it flows and its structure. Having had to deal with many case of dementia the way you have worded your poem does you credit. The one failing is I am not a fan of your first line "Let's give it up". I have always associated that with a round of applause (for a man with mental health problems?), I am sure that is not your intention. Would you consider a different first line? To me you have the answer underneath your name "Just a thought floating in his head" fits in so well with the flow of your poem.
Edward (hedgehog1)


Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dillonjensen

7 Years Ago

Wow! Thank you for your kind words and review. I think with the first line my intention was a play o.. read more

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Added on June 22, 2017
Last Updated on June 22, 2017

Author

dillonjensen
dillonjensen

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Welcome to the chaos that is me. more..

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