Duality

What can I do?

My mind tells me it's over.

I shouldn't hope for more.

You're better off without me,

it won't take you long to see.

My heart tells me to be strong.

This can't really be the end,

giving up now would be wrong.

We can't just let that happen.

My mind recalls those moments,

of pain and unbridled resentment.

Every crushing blow we dealt,

every hurtful word and phrase we felt.

My heart pushes those thoughts aside.

I recall the warmth lying at your side,

our joint breathless laughter,

and the twinkling in your eyes.

My mind reminds me of your face.

The emptiness last time I saw you,

the look of resolute acceptance,

and lack of answers for our fate.

My heart reminds me of your touch,

your arms wrapped around me,

Eyes closed, asking for 5 more minutes,

finally letting ourselves breathe.

My mind rewinds the recent months.

I blindly struggled with my doubts.

Hearing your words without listening,

Now I want so badly to be forgiven.

My heart loves you despite it all.

You used to be so sure of us,

while I waited for the inevitable fall,

but now our roles are reversed.

My mind braces for the worst,

that this is more than a pause,

we succumbed to the curse,

a path frequently traversed.

My heart will hope for the best,

foolishly and damningly beating on,

until your final word puts it to rest,

and I must accept that you're gone.

Each day this duality wages forward,

My mind wins and then my heart,

Always dealing out in battles,

But neither winning the war.