True Love

My definition of true love

 

True love acceptance

You as you, I as I, we

Perfect together

Author's Note

This is my first attempt at poetry of any kind. Thanks Bonnie for introducing me to Haiku and Senryu.

Reviews

[Susan S.]

To set the record straight:
1. 5-7-5 syllables is the traditional american method. Japan doesn't use syllables like we do so it just doesn't equate.
2. Something of nature in the poem is traditional american and new Japan. The problem lies in the fact that the concept of Haiku didn't happen until quite recently in the history of Japan. It was pretty much the manufacture of one man. Before that the substance was specific to the person who was going to get the piece.
3. Senryu--and let me make this really clear--Senryu isn't JUST about human emotion. It's a comic slant on humanity. Kinda like the limerick.
4. The three line poem, the 17 syllable poem, the short nature poem and the human nature poem can all be found in other cultures around the world. There is, in fact, so many permutations and modifications of this kind of poetry that the moderators at wikipedia have been arguing over the Haiku entry for years and there's no end in sight.

My suggestion is we look at the intent and the grace of the poem and leave our ideas of what is and isn't a Haiku at home.

That being said, I find this piece of poetry to be quite deep in meaning. It has more heart than almost all of my poetry, Dianne. You might want to look a little at where you end your lines, though. Having the concepts lop over into the next line makes it feel a bit unbalanced and out of step.

[Kaili]

So simple, yet so true. :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Now that is a powerful statement in so few words... it rings so true, when you love one another you love them for who they are and not try to change them... Very nicely done.

[Jason Kish]

Overall, there's a really good feeling associated with this poem; it's short, simple, and sweet.

Excellent first attempt. I don't know too much about Haiku's, but I enjoyed this.

[K. Aurora]

I thought this was very true. It takes to complete individuals coming together to make a super whole circle of love.

Alot of good things can come from this, if people really think about it. :)

Kansas :)

[radian7]

The poem captures the epitome of what we want in any valued relationship. Being accepted for who we are is likely a universal hunger. Accepting others .... well now that is a different expectation and task altogether. Loved the succinct form and powerful message.

[Christopher 'Windstorm'..]

brilliant! it is a excellent look at ones prospective of love when they thought they were alone, now understand that many have the same thoughts. brilliant!

[xlynne]

for your first attempt at poetry its really good. haikus are tough but what i like about them is that they force you to simply state how it is and thats how you did it here. you took a subject that people write pages and pages about, and you boiled it down to one basic feeling that love can make you feel.

[HoorayForUnderdog]

I am not a literary scholar but what I like in Haiku-type poems is that an idea can be expressed in a minimum of words and those words are chosen precisely and that it forms a picture in my mind. Keep up the good work!

[Sara Muschweck]

Wonderful first attempt, you have stated simply and beautifully a true definition of what love should be. Well done.

[Rainbowco]

Lovely