The Lie

A poem I wrote!

A little kid, moaned in fears,

But, in the chase for life he wiped his tears,

He looked around, he saw people dying,

Families shouting and crying.

 

All around were ashes and fires,

Everybody he knew were liars,

He thought things can never be good,

Life is a fight he understood.

 

All he wanted was a chance for survival,

Everybody around seemed a rival,

Humanity suffered, he wanted life,

But all there ever was strife.

 

He gave up, he wanted to die,

He didn’t want to give life a try,

His soul floated in the sky,

The truth for him was life is lie.

Author's Note

Please feel free to give me honest feedback! Ratings and Reviews appreciated!!!

Reviews

[Pushkar Prabhat]

well life isn't fair..........that is no lie.........
the only goal is survival.........we need to get up after each fall and keep on........that doesn't require anyone else........so even if they lie.....it doesn't matter........
all else is a lie indeed.

beautifully expressed.......
i loved it!!!
:)

[Dhrit Khona]

Thanks Pushkar!

[Coyote Poetry]

You said enough in the poem. Scary world, no opportunity and trying to find purpose. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Dhrit Khona]

So just want to thank all the people who read and shared their reviews, you are helping me grow as a poet!

[Gee]

Hi Dhrit,I have read most of your poems and am impressed at your ability,especially as you are of tender years.I would imagine that like the rest of us you aim to improve and I think on your part counting syllables or tapping out a beat to each line may help.Keep up the good work

[Dhrit Khona]

Thanks a gazillion!

[Gee]

You are most welcome my new found,pen wielding friend.Take care

[Terrence Chang]

The rhymes are good in your poem keep up the good work

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Vivid, powerful imagery!
I was able to see the little boy crying helplessly in the midst of riots like chaos!
Very well done, Dhrit!

[Avinash]

This is your first poem I am reading and I see a great promise in you. Yes the life is a lie but you never stop looking for truth. That is the purpose of life. Your truth may defer from others.
Most of the times you will have to find it not anywhere else but inside you. All you need to do is to take deep breathe and dive and see what you see without closing your eyes. I wish you best.

[Gurleen Saluja]

A sensational write. Truly good to read. Thanks for sharing. :)

[Adiyah]

u have depicted d dark side of the lyf..ur writing is in a progressive form..first u portrayd charactr of a child whoz bit scared...dn he comes to knw d facts of lyf...the struggles.....but life isnt a lie...its not the truth..u mst have maintained d progressive form......but i loved ur poem :)

[several thousand]

Great poem with perfect rhyming and an interesting message. Thanks for sharing.