in the search of a friend

What pushes people down the rabbit hole?

in the search of a friend

D.C. Saylor

Amarus Young was an unfortunate man. Not only did he often experience misfortune, but his existence was unfortunate for the entire town of Muff. When Amarus walked in a room, he brought with him a climate of drudgery and irritability that stained the walls grey. His drunkenness caused him to rant endlessly about his back luck, about when he lost his life savings during a weekend trip to Reno, and how his father never appreciated him. Amarus thought much more highly of himself than did his community and he spent many nights alone in his dreary apartment pondering why he was so abhorred. He never understood why, he was too esteemed to accept the fact that his company was enough to drive a Mormon to drink. 

After many years of frustration and social exile, Amarus suddenly became very determined to gain the respect he thought he deserved. He told himself he would do absolutely anything to gain just one friend, and anything beyond that was just good fortune.

Amarus began dissolving the behavior that had ostracized him from the people of Muff for so many years. He stopped drinking; the ranting ceased. He stopped complaining; the headaches went away. He kept a smile on his face, contrary to the look of discontent that he so often sported. But he did not change the way he dressed, he could not afford that. He still walked to work every day, getting mud splashed up on him by the cars that drove by, the ones that he could not afford. Three weeks went by after Amarus's transformation and not an acquaintance did he gain. 

"Damn prisses!" Amarus shouted at his kitchen sink, "What must I do to please this town?" Amarus began to realize how unforgiving the citizens of muff were. He had been just as nice as anyone the past three weeks. Nicer than some, he thought. He inquired about others’ mothers and talked about himself less. Alas, Amarus got the same hostile glances that he received three weeks prior. As he opened a fresh bottle of vodka for the first time in almost a month, he heard a knock on the door. 

"It's late," Amarus spit at the visitor. 

"It's important, sir. Man paid a good sum to make sure I got this to you tonight, sir,” the boy responded, speaking much too loudly than needed to be heard through the thin, cracking walls. 

"Something for me?" Amarus muttered to himself. 

"Well, what is it?" He asked, nervous in his piteous state of mind that any package meant for him was surely meant to harm him.

"It's just a note, sir. I can read it to you, if you like." 

"Go ahead" 

"Well," the boy unfolded the parchment, "note says you 'oughta be in the alley behind the church at midnight. Says he's got somethin' for yuh." 

"Very well. Thank you, boy." Amarus said, dismissing the messenger. Then, against his better judgement, Amarus put on his boots and set off for the church across town. 

"Hello?" Amarus bellowed into the blackness, "If anybody's there, I have a knife, so don't try anything, because I don't want to have to use it. You see, I'm a peaceful man, never hurt nobody; no sir, even when they..." 

"Amarus! I'm thrilled you came." Said a deep, echoing voice. 

"Yes, I'm here! I didn't want to come, but I never really get any letters, and lately I've been trying to..." 

"To better yourself?" the man interjected, "I know, good Amarus, I've seen how much you've changed in only a few weeks. Such a shame that no one else picked up on that, wouldn’t you say?" 

"I can't see you..." Amarus replied, tired of searching the dark for the mysterious stranger. 

"I'm right here"Amarus, don't be afraid, just listen to what I have to tell you." The man said, now sounding much closer than before. Amarus saw the outline of a long, thin face. He continued talking before Amarus had a chance to speak. 

"I've been watching you, friend, I've seen how desperately you've tried and tried to make a change in your life. I realize that the stars haven't exactly aligned for you quite yet. It's a shame, a man does all he can do to please others, despite his own desires, and receives no adoration at all. Well Amarus, I'm rather new here, but I have heard a good lot about you. You and your gin have a decent reputation for providing the police, the slavers, and anxious mothers with something to outshine their own sins.” 

"Some might say that, I suppose," Amarus studdered.

"And you live alone, correct? No wife, haven't had a girl in… years?" 

"That... that is correct. Are you here to ridicule me? Don't bother, I get enough of it.”

"No, no, no... I see the good in you, Amarus. I'm a fair man, you see? I take a fellow for who he is, not the clothes he wears or the farm he tends. I'm aghast at the judgmental people in this horrid town. I'm here because you and I are a lot alike, Amarus. People don't see me for who I really am; they despise me for my etiquette. It's jealousy, I presume... Anyway, I want to help your cause! It seems what's keeping you from your goal is quite simple isn't it? It's money, I believe?"

"Well, I certainly hadn't considered that before, but I think... maybe you're right. I've done everything I can do to be more pleasant! I bathed at least once a week, even gave a coin to the bum that sits outside Shandy's... Those base simpletons! Shame a decent man who hasn't any provisions!" Amarus's anger developed his timid, nervous tone into a desperate screech that echoed across Muff. 

"Exactly, Amarus,” the man whispered as he put one hand on Amarus's shoulder, "That's what's missing. You can be near saintly, but as long as the depth of your pocketbook remains unchanged…”

A long pause. The few melodramatic facial lines that Amarus could see on the stranger broke free for the first time and morphed into a sinister gaze that could have been either an empty beam or violent scowl. 

“But I can fix that. You see, I've come into a large amount of money lately... I mean, very large. As a part of my own reckoning, I've been searching for a charitable way to dispense of it. I see you've suffered quite a bit, Amarus, and I'd like to give this money to you." The wind blew in silence for a few moments, and the snowflakes finally felt safe enough to begin falling on Muff. 

"I'll take it!" Amarus exclaimed, "Why, yes, I've worked rather hard my entire life, and I do believe some money would lift a remarkable load off my back! Are you sure, though? You want to give a stranger your fortune?" 

"Indeed." The man smirked.

"It's getting rather late..." Amarus remarked, "What is your name?" 

"I go by many names. None of them very flattering, I'm afraid." 

"Oh, I see." Amarus said. 

"My good sir, I'm prepared to hand over to you the money that you desire, but first, will you shake on one thing?" The man asked. 

"I do believe that depends on what it is you wish to shake on!" Amarus boasted. 

"Will you work for me? If not in this life, maybe the next?” 

Amarus hesitated.

“Are you, by chance, able to explain exactly what you mean by that?" he beckoned. 

"I don't find many who are suited to the work that I need done. It's very important work, I assure you, and it won't take very much time at all. I do think you'll enjoy it, Amarus." 

"Perhaps if you're more specific on what it is that needs doing, I'll be happy to do it." Amarus stated with pride. He hadn't felt needed in so very long. 

"I'm a simple businessman, and my business depends on..." The man covered his shaded face with his forearm and began backing away as a light started approaching from behind me. 

"Hello, Mate? Can you help me find the tavern? Shandy's kicked me out and I'd like not to piss on the street if I don't 'ave to," said a man that sounded like Philip Brandison, slurring his words and stumbling about the narrow alleyway. 

"It's just around the corner, now please, I'm quite busy and you're interrupting something rather important,” Amarus responded, eager to get the man to leave out of fear that his new found wealth would flee from the disturbance. 

“Right," The man garbled as he tramped away in a serpentine pattern.

Amarus turned his head to face the businessman, but in those few moments he had disappeared. 

"Wait!" he yelled across the alley, suddenly immersed in sweat and panic, "You were about to tell me what it is I am to do for you!" 

"Haven't you served him your whole life, Amarus?" the voice returned, this time without a shadowy figure in its company. "Where has he gotten you? They've fooled you. The people who abhor the very core of you are the ones you trusted? They told you his glory is the only path to salvation, well, it seems salvation hasn't yet found you, Amarus. Salvation is exclusive. It's for the elite among you. It's for the outcasts, the ones who's excellence is shunned by a god loving society. The irony! God is weak, they are weak, and you are weak if you do not take my deal, Amarus. You will spend the remainder of your days on earth in affluence, and every day after that you shall wield unimaginable power! What do you say, Amarus Young?" 

"You're right. How can I have faith in the god of my adversaries? I'll do whatever you say, but on one condition." Amarus declared. 

"The only conditions are my own,” the businessman asserted with a sonorous boom and slight reproach. 

Amarus's hands began to shake in unison with his grinding teeth. 

"Take me now," he pleaded. 

 

Author's Note

As an atheist, this is my attempt to explore biblical themes judiciously. Let me know how I did!

Reviews

[Marie]

This is a good story, but I don't know if you were trying to make a point or not. I mean, if you hadn't said you were an atheist, I couldn't have told it just from the story.