Ricochets at the Water Park and what NOT to teach a kid

There's nothing like alcohol to make a stupid idea seem brilliant.

A friend of my girl has a ten year old son with no father. 

He wanted to go to Adventure Island water park in Tampa. 

Somehow I got volunteered to take the little wiener. 

Two women were in on this so no way was I getting out of it. 

Besides, we're talking about a water park full of water slides

and wall to wall dripping wet girls in bikinis running around giggling. 

It's not going to take much convincing to get me interested in that. 

So I took little wiener to the water park. 

Little wiener was fascinated by my service in the corps. 

So he asked me about thirty thousand questions on the drive up. 

Some were serious, other were silly.

Like how many people had I'd killed 

and what color socks did Saddam Hussein wear. 

He seemed disappointed when I told him there are some things you DO NOT 

ask veterans and that I'd never met Saddam Hussein.

But he kept on asking questions. 

I humored him as best I could but he was starting to drive me crazy.

I thought. "This might not have been such a swell idea." 

Finally we got to Adventure Island and we actually had a great time. 

There were plenty of dripping wet girls in bikinis 

running around giggling so I was mightily entertained 

and both little wiener and I had a ball on all the water slides. 

Little wiener didn't pay much attention to the giggling bikini girls. 

I thought "puberty hasn't kicked in yet." Which was great.

He should have all the innocent fun he can in his childhood years

because puberty is going to f**k all that up eight ways from Sunday. 

It sure as s**t happened to me that way. 

Little wiener slept for most of the drive home. 

I was relieved for the hour of silence this provided. 

Then when we got home and we all gathered for dinner 

and us grownups had some wine I had a major lapse of judgment.

While the girls were in the house doing whatever it is girls do in the house 

I took little wiener outside and taught him how to make a flamethrower 

with an aerosol can and a Bic lighter.  

I thought he should experience the sheer joy of flames spitting from 

a can of raid and the cool a*s sound the aerosol and oxygen makes when 

it hits that lighter before puberty fucked his life up and took some of the boyhood wonder out of doing really stupid s**t.

This was basic boy stuff 101 when I was growing up.

He thought it was the coolest thing that ever happened in his life.

A United States Marine had taught him how to make a flame thrower.

In boydom  it doesn't get much cooler than that.

His mother however had a very different take on the situation. 

When she found out I was the one who taught him that trick, oh boy.

She went screaming to my girl and my girl came screaming to me.

Man was I ever in the hot seat for that one. 

I know I shouldn't have taught him how to make a flamethrower.

But still, boys love destructive, powerful things.

And some women don't get that. 

Reviews

[ANTO]

I saw this trick used to great effect in the mens room of my workplace. It was just harmless fun and Mick who was on the throne at the time - well he soon grew more pubes and the blisters on his d**k healed pretty well.
You havent changed a bit Baby Ricochet - nor would we want you to!
Thanks for sharing - and hi again...

[Baby Ricochet]

ANTO!!!!!!!! My man!!!!!!! You're back!!!!! That's awesome!!!! Where have you been??? What have you been up too?? Thanks for reading my story and for the review story.

[ANTO]

You are blowing me away with that welcome back BR - its too much - im getting emo but I'll say this: if I knew it would feel this good then I would have went away and came back years ago lol.
I shall PM you soon my friend and ...ahem...'fill you in'...
BIG-A*S-HUG to you BR and your xtremely welcome for the review -

[Sami Khalil]

A very cool story from a talented poet and writer. Fun to be in the hot seat...Excellent...:)......

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Sami

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)........

[Coyote Poetry]

My wife and daughter wouldn't like you either. Their boys are demons already. They would enjoy a flame throwing lesson. I enjoyed the story. I go to the beach weekly with Grandchildren in the summer . I got old. Young mothers sit with in tiny bathing suits and they want conversation. I 'm polite. Grand-boys are near. Always a adventure with kids. Always seeking more information.
Coyote

[Baby Ricochet]

LOL! Thanks for reading and reviewing Coyote. It's always a pleasure hearing from you

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Rita L. Sev]

Boys... at every age, will indeed be boys. I know you caught some trouble, Mark, but that kid will always remember you, that's for sure!

[Baby Ricochet]

No doubt. Thanks Rita

[Solitary_Streets]

great cool story, it's different and def brings up ideas and memories in your head, haha good job

[Baby Ricochet]

Thanks for stopping by

[Inda]

love this, your use of language and the rawness of it all is just fantastic, a bit like Bukowski, although i seem to look for parallels for him constantly. :)

[Baby Ricochet]

I've read Bukowski. I found his constant drunkenness kind of off putting. Just didn't jel well with my USMC background

[Tate Morgan]

Oh yeah sounds like the time I gave nine year old Drake a switch blade it was a cool Harley switch blade I agree the wonder years the need for aan to teach them all thus cool stuff

[Baby Ricochet]

A switch blade makes that cool a*s sound when the blade flips open. I could be entertained by that all day

[Tate Morgan]

Yeah so was he as he had to let all his friends in on it. One day I called his mother and heard in the background bump bump bump bump crash.Again and again I said what is that ? Robyn says Oh thanks Tate not only does my house smell like gunsmoke from the 48 boxes of caps and the dual six shooters you left him but Him and his friend In an effort to be like you took my 6000 dollar couch apart to ride the cushions down the staircase lol.

[Baby Ricochet]

Yep.When they act like boys it's all our fault

[Tate Morgan]

I think I should show him how to shoot tennis balls from a tube with a little lighter fluid

[Tshogyal Moktan]

But still, boys love destructive, powerful things.
And some women don't get that.

End of the story but such a boy thing.....I loved it with all the pictures revolving my head.....

[Baby Ricochet]

Thanks for stopping by

[R Smith]

love this story, you did a real good thing for the boy taking him to the waterpark, the outcome of the flamethrower was a bit of a downer, think i'd have been goggle eyed when i was a kid to see that but guess we all get a tongue lashing sometimes from the wife, it was a great story and you did real good :)

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Richard

[Lydia Shutter]

A real "slice of life" story. I enjoyed every second of it. The honesty is charismatic. You did a wonderful thing for that "little wiener". He will never forget the day a U.S. Marine spent with him at the water park and then teaching him how to make a flame thrower...and for other reasons his mom will not forget it either! You left me with a smile, my friend. Thank you. Happy Thanksgiving. Lydi**

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Lydia and happy thanksgiving