President Jack

Our leaders aren't crooked enough

I Voted for a congressman 

who promised I'd get laid

Sent his a*s to Washington 

That blowhard's getting paid

Saw him on the FOX network 

just braying like a mule

I voted for that idiot

He played me for a fool 

I'm sick of all the sellout w****s

passing for electorate

The next time I stuff a ballot box

I'm voting for a pirate

An eye patch wearing peg leg pirate

and all he says is "arrrg" 

That's what we need in Washington

Put captain Hook in charge 

Make Billy Bones a senator 

let wenches roam the streets

pack the house with drunken sailors

who serve the motley fleets

A treasury of gold doubloons 

packed in a dead man's chest

Thrown over board to Davy Jones

The locker he possessed

A new world foreign policy

of looting coastal towns

Start paying off their parliaments 

With rum and pistol rounds 

Round up all the fat cat leaders

and make them walk the plank 

We can keel haul congressmen 

across the old gangplank 

Vote Captain Jack for President 

I think he's slightly gay

We're being run by criminals 

It's turning out that way 

Author's Note

Pirates. Why not.

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

I'd certainly vote for Captain Jack.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thanks TL........

[Draven]

Jack Sparrow: Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid.

[Mark]

Heheee there really is a Pirate party. In fact if they get their s**t together enough to actually have candidates I'm voting for them. Great poem brother, funny, gritty, and plenty o' dah truth!

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Mark

[Bright Ocean Star]

The open honesty of exactly who he is would be greatly refreshing! He couldn't be doing any worse than what is already happening now! Love it! Cap'n Jack for President. What a good idea! Great rhythm and meter. Love it. It makes me laugh!

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Anne

[Lilly Sophia]

I really liked this. I was drawn to the title because I actually voted for Captain Jack Sparrow in the election. Wrote him in.

[Baby Ricochet]

Now that's funny. Thank you Lilly

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Raise the Jolly Rancher...a bit of humor...
every time I read one of your writes...
yet you send a message in the read...
Politics is a whole ball of wax...

[Baby Ricochet]

Thanks for dropping by Glen

[Glen Yumang Manese]

you're welcome...

[Corset]

hell yeah why not! lol, funny one, but sadly true in many ways. I love captn Jack, I'd vote for him, couldn't be much worse, at least he has a conscienious when there's something in it for him, lol...our government and religious systems? not so much.

[Baby Ricochet]

That's for sure. Thanks for stopping by

[Inda]

Jack is better choice because at least we know from the start he is a criminal and he is hilarious!

[Baby Ricochet]

That's for sure. Thanks Inda

[Tai Ryens]

Fun fact!
Pirates actually initiated healthcare charters that guaranteed that pirates injured in raids would be guaranteed certain benefits, such as Morgan who offered 600 pieces of eight for a lost hand or foot, 1,800 pieces if you lost both, and this wasn't just to a small crew of raiders. His crew totaled up to roughly 2,000 members.
Oh, and most pirates accepted homosexuals far before most of society did under the guise that, so long as you can fight, you are eligible for their band. This means that females were tolerated more by pirates rather than most of the world at the time. And religious tolerance.
Jack Sparrow would certainly have my vote.

[Baby Ricochet]

That is interesting. Thanks Tai

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Arggggggggggg!....

That's not a bad thought, Baby.... lol

Jack would have my vote... I like pirates...and bad boys... ;)

[Baby Ricochet]

Arrrg!!!!!!