Over the crimson sky

Find love in myself
maybe then I'll find healing
But I'm terrified
For what I might find
For the killer inside me
Who needs to be healed
For what he has done
So he could survive
For just one more day
To see the sunrise
Over the crimson sky

Author's Note

Capchya "shambles" This place is fucking with me

Reviews

[Pryde Foltz]

For the killer inside me
Who needs to be healed
For what he has done
So he could survive

You were young, baby, and you were manipulated. We all are when we are told that war is the way. (With a few exceptions, there is almost always another way.) We do not blame the child soldier, but magically at 18, we call one an adult. Research shows that the brain is not fully-developed for moral-reasoning until the age of 21, and then the average person will take four or so years to get that new-development up and functioning. You acted within international law … the way of the world … now you use your pen to try to change that 'way of the world'. There is forgiveness for you, Baby. I truly believe that, but it does start with you. Really, it's there.

[icelandicblue]

Pryde,

Your response is so supportive and understanding. I am awed by your insight.

[Pryde Foltz]

Thank you, IcyBlue. I don't what to say to that. I am humbled.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you pryde. I appreciate it

[Corset]

Surviver's guilt well written all over this poem, but i'm glad you survived baby, and guess what, you pretty much get a "pass go and collect 200 dollars or get outta jail free card" for surviving, and do you know why? Because it bothers you, if it didn't bother you we'd be worried about you, but you are a tough guy and the hard part is over, the surviving, the rest is learning to live with your right to be here when your comrades are not, I wouldn't feel to guilty about that last part, you have the s**t job, this "living with it stuff" that comes after, you can put it into perspective though, I know you will.

[Baby Ricochet]

A work in progress. Thank you corset

[Chris]

Gotta love the capchas... and they say AI's don't have a sense of humor!

How are you holding up?

[Baby Ricochet]

I'm okay. Thanks for asking. Namaste Chris

[Tai Ryens]

The haunting of memories is apparent here, and I truly see the words of a tortured soul. This piece was filled with so many poignant emotions . . . Keep writing, friend

[Baby Ricochet]

thank you Tai

[emmajoy]

People are born to kill, whether it's a wasp or a red ant or the meat put on a plate.. and whilst war is evil for whatever the reasons for it, it's how us damned members of the Human Race are made. You feel so deeply, so intensely, so sadly .. and yet .. survive. And it's survival that gives you the time to do more in life than you ever, ever dreamed. BR, some bright spark once said or wrote something like, '.. wearing guilt is like wearing your nakedness, cover up and you learn to feel again, warm outside in..'

Your write so touchingly here, but those three last lines are .. far more. Truly.

[Baby Ricochet]

thank you Emma

[emmajoy]

you're welcome - never quite know how to express myself to you.. maybe get things wrong.

[Mark]

It's always great to see you write something introspective. You do it honestly. Thank you for sharing this inside look into your heart.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you mark

[MsJewel]

I agree with Pryde. You were manipulated at a very young age. There is nothing you can do to go back and change it, horrible as it was...writing can be very theraputic. I hope writing about it helps.
Hugs, Julie

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you jewel

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and Pryde is so right....you did what you had to do...unfortunately, even knowing that probably doesn't help heal the emotional wounds from what war does to people...

we can only try to come to some kind of terms...the best we can.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Jacob

[Gleb Zavlanov]

Wonderful, dark and mysterious work, whose simplicity only adds to the power. Great write!

P.s.

I had worse capchyas. A few times I stumbled upon 'titmarsh' and 'balfuq.' I did not make these up!

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Gleb. These capchyas are a lot like fortune cookies.

[Lyn Anderson]

This is so beautiful, and so simple at the same time. A splendid write.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you KL

[Travis Gibson (poetic h..]

Bravo... You words have such strength and a tenderness within them. Truly words of a fighter seeking peace.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you poetic heroics