The Physical Abuser

A physically abusive man getting drunk in a bar rationalizes and justifies his behavior. I'm not advocating domestic violence. You all know I like to write from the other side of the coin.

She always starts this s**t with me
    then says the fault is mine
If she'd shut her Goddamn mouth
  everything would be just fine

  I work my fingers to the bone
    though she's never grateful
   To hear that evil b***h nagging
      I'm the one who's hateful

   She's got the kids against me now
       They just want to use me
      Dad's a great big piggy bank
         All they want is money

When they're to big for they're boots
         and show me disrespect
    When they back talk out of line
       They know what to expect

    These kids today they get away
         with anything they want
       Sick little s***s and criminals
         and parents are at fault

   You need to discipline your kids
         with methods unrefined
  You have to beat sense into them
       to keep your brood in line

  Bar keep give me one more shot
          I have to drink alone
   Someone needs a lesson taught
         As soon as I get home

   So don't stick your labels on me
        I'm not the one to blame
    What else am I supposed to do
        All they respect is pain

Author's Note

This isn't a social commentary on how to discipline kids. This is a guy sitting alone in a bar getting hammered justifying his behavior through. Anger, projection, denial, rationalization and justification and that's all this poem is.

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

Wow. The guy is a jerk - and unfortunately all too real. Too real for comfort. This is like you got into my dad's head. I could tell you horror stories but I'll just leave it at this: this poem made me shudder because I know this guy. He raised me...
Excellent poem.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you TL

[Mark]

Sadly, I know this guy. I called him Grampy.

[Baby Ricochet]

That is sad. Thanks for reading mark

[Mark]

My pleasure, it was very well done.

[Marie]

Excellent portrayal of someone who needs to straighten out...or straighten up...or be shot...

[Baby Ricochet]

One of the three is good.

[Caradoc]

Indeed. Discipline is sorely lacking in the children of today. So too are many husbands, mothers, fathers falling prey to the vices and the addiction. They're too messed up by their own problems to do right by their kids. It's a sad mess, and through this piece, you can see the man struggling to be the husband, the father he should be, yet failing. In the end this man only becomes something for his family to fear.

I would say this is a telling, emotional piece.

You tackled it well.

-Caradoc

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Caradoc

[Marie]

The man is a jerk.

[Baby Ricochet]

Yes he is. A drunken one too.

[Adri Moolman]

this is really really good... There is so many people like this out there

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Adri

[QuietlyCrash]

Wow, this is excellent. I thoroughly enjoyed this. Every line was written in such a way I could just hear the acid in his words and smell the booze on his breath. Fantastic.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you QuietlyCrash

[Rita L. Sev]

This has such a raw and honest feel to it - just what might be going on inside the mind of this man. I can't help but think that this man used to be the "bully" in your previous piece. He simply responds and reacts as he knows how. Clean rhymes, good flow, important topic - great job!

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Rita.

[KAOlmsted]

This is excellent work. Social commentary all wrapped up in an entertaining piece...you do these so well, Mark. Good on ya.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you

[KAOlmsted]

Sure...and FYI I knew what you were trying to do here, to get it from "his" point of view...and also, social commentary = a spoken or written act of rebellion toward an individual or group; commentary on social issues or society...seems you've done that beautifully here ;-) xoxo

[Frieda P]

Not digging the message in this one at all Mark, you've written it well, but you have no clue what that kind of abuse does to a kid....just a caring, and understanding parent setting limits is what is needed, not pain.

[Baby Ricochet]

This is a guy sitting in a bar getting drunk justifying his behavior. It's not a social commentary. I changed the intro for a better explaination

[Frieda P]

I have no problem with your read, you know where I'm coming from...drunk or sober, it's not a great message, you addressed it, I'm fine with that, just giving you my 2 cents worth....

[Baby Ricochet]

Here's the message to this poem. I'm angry, I'm drunk, I take it out on my family but I have to justify it. THat's it.

[Frieda P]

I get it...ha, you're not reading me right.

[Frieda P]

Huh?

[Baby Ricochet]

This poem is written from the perpetrator's perspective. His thoughts, his justifications. So far Kimmer's the only one who got it. I'll wait for more reviews. If I think the poem missed the mark I'll re-work it. Maybe make the perpetrator more villainous and obviously intoxicated with more verse focused on his problems. That might do the trick

[Frieda P]

Well the kimmer is smarter than the average bear, and I told you, it's where I'm coming from, we all read differently from our own perspectives, it's a fine write Mark....

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you. It needed a better explanation in the introduction is all.

[Zap-the-awesome]

Whipping kids is a sore subject with many. I was raised with a switch and belt myself. But beating them, with your fist..? No, that's just wrong.

[Zap-the-awesome]

Great work by the way.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank I changed the intro

[Zap-the-awesome]

I didnt think you were holding up nor doing any of this behavior. I've read enough of your stuff to realize you writing style. Please don't think I was accusing you of any of it.