I chased you with a lawnmower The mower of my past My past is full of diesel fuel You spilled on the grass The grass turned some weird a*s color The color of my pain My pain is in my a*s right now God you drive me insane Is sanity something we all lose when losers come around She was round like a meaty Zeppelin that got to close to the ground The ground that's covered in diesel fuel you spilled you little fool The fool is in a deck of cards What will I do with you
Oh I am so all over chain verse poetry now...I have GOT to try it...It's probably not nearly as easy as you make it look with this piece...really well done! Thanks for sharing this and giving kimmer a spark of inspiration...we'll see if I can pull it off ;-) xoxo
Brilliant, creative and disturbing at the same time--I love it. I've run across a few individuals that might have inspired me to want to run over them with a riding lawnmower myself--not that I ever would.
I liked this,
Creative for sure. I think I might have to try this chain piece thing. It has a good flow to it almost like a blues song with a stop and flow style guitar, at least to me it did as I read it. You did a great job in your ending with pulling the beginning back into it with out keeping the chain from circling, very nice. I will say though I felt with the fun and flowing nature of the piece the ending might at that point circle around to it's beginning more directly. Just a thought and I have never wrote like this intentionally at least, that said I have no idea if there is a direct method or if it is more add lib. Any way another fun and well written piece my friend.
Sincerely
Christopher
100/100
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
thank you chris
11 Years Ago
Of course Ric,
You don't mind the nickname do you?
Chris
I write just for the hell of it
A way to spend some time
Blurting out in cyber space
Whatever's on my mind
Maybe funny maybe tragic
Emotional and raw
Politi.. more..