I see what you mean...this is really quite a departure, Mark. I like it a lot (except for the rotting lilacs...I don't care for that :-p) We all need to shed that dead skin, though. This is a truly excellent piece. That third stanza especially. Really great work here.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
The line was originally "Coffins blooming purple lilacs" but once the whole decay theme was formed p.. read moreThe line was originally "Coffins blooming purple lilacs" but once the whole decay theme was formed purple lilacs didn't work in the piece. This poem was written out of the rhyme and meter, not a set premise like say "Bully" was. Thank you for reading Blooming Coffins Kimmer. I appreciate it.
11 Years Ago
Always my pleasure, Baby...(and, obviously, my offense to the line is personal, not artistic; it's a.. read moreAlways my pleasure, Baby...(and, obviously, my offense to the line is personal, not artistic; it's a powerful line. Wish they had been lilies though) ;-) xoxo
Looking backward walking forward
Always one step ahead
A parade of screaming demons
Tormented by the dead
I really like your poem. It was powerfully descriptive and had a nice easy flow. Although, I like your description, I love lilacs and was sad to read they were rotting. But it was a great description and really set a good visual. Baby Ricochet that is what good poetry is all about and I believe you accomplished it! Thanks for sharing!
I felt like I was in the poem, and it was so vivid. The details and imagery are amazing. This is beautiful, haunting, ethereal, and perfect. I loved it :)
This is an amazing piece. I am reminded of both Poe and Dickinson reading this; the images of death and decay; the shedding of one's own life... Death comes to us so many more times than that final time - you have faced that fact with this write, and laid it out for all to see. Excellent!
The imagery is vivid. Lines are full of powerful, thoughtful, and deeply prodding life moments. So different from what I have read of your work thus far. It is dark, yet there is so much to be found within the lines to find the light in it as well. Really wonderful penning, Mark!
You took me to the cemetary here. I walked beside you as you went through this place. The imagery here is stark and vivid, making it feel as if I was right there. I could feel the tingles going down my back as I read it, and I can feel the demon pressing up against your skin. The third to last stanza really got to me, and I love this piece as a whole. Well done, Mark.
I see what you mean...this is really quite a departure, Mark. I like it a lot (except for the rotting lilacs...I don't care for that :-p) We all need to shed that dead skin, though. This is a truly excellent piece. That third stanza especially. Really great work here.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
The line was originally "Coffins blooming purple lilacs" but once the whole decay theme was formed p.. read moreThe line was originally "Coffins blooming purple lilacs" but once the whole decay theme was formed purple lilacs didn't work in the piece. This poem was written out of the rhyme and meter, not a set premise like say "Bully" was. Thank you for reading Blooming Coffins Kimmer. I appreciate it.
11 Years Ago
Always my pleasure, Baby...(and, obviously, my offense to the line is personal, not artistic; it's a.. read moreAlways my pleasure, Baby...(and, obviously, my offense to the line is personal, not artistic; it's a powerful line. Wish they had been lilies though) ;-) xoxo
I write just for the hell of it
A way to spend some time
Blurting out in cyber space
Whatever's on my mind
Maybe funny maybe tragic
Emotional and raw
Politi.. more..