What Is A Man? (God not this crap again)

What is a man? Unzip your fly and see what's there.

What is a man, f**k I don't know
I don't dwell upon it much
I am who I am, that's pretty much it
Maybe that's just a crutch

I can legally drink I can legally vote
I have service in the corps
A dick is dangling between my legs
I know just what it's for

Though I have a job and a girlfriend
Babies I've yet to make
Does that detail count against me
When manhood is at stake

I have gigantic pumped up muscles
Do I get extra points
or is that a childish self indulgence
A man I self anoint

What does that mean? I don't know
and no I just don't care
I do what I do, that's pretty much it
and I think that's fair

And though I could be an immature
ginormous spoiled brat
I take care of what I need to do
and really that's just that

Author's Note

The dude in the photo is Rock and Roll Legend Lemmy from Motorhead

Reviews

[KAOlmsted]

The power of rock and roll...if you don't believe it, just ask Lemmy how many millions of times he's gotten laid xD *shudder* Meanwhile, that has sweet f**k all to do with this piece so...I digress...

That last stanza says it all, and that, my friend, is Man in a nutshell...big, whiny a*s babies but when it all comes down to it, the s**t that needs doing gets done. Superior write, this. I like the new avatar, too ;-) Big and blond gets kimmer every time xD

xoxo

[Baby Ricochet]

Ah Lemmy. Ugliest man in Rock and Roll. Thank you Kimmer

[KAOlmsted]

My absolute pleasure...

[jkhatz]

I beg to differ. The title, Ugliest Man in Rock and Roll, has always been proudly held by one Joey Ramone.

[Baby Ricochet]

Flavor Flav wasn't winning any beauty contest's either and there was Slash for an LA ugmo

[KAOlmsted]

xD Holy jkhatz ... that is so true!

[jkhatz]

Slash was freakin' hott!

[jkhatz]

Then again, I always found Freddie Mercury to be a sexpot, so, maybe I'm not the best one to ask.read moreThen again, I always found Freddie Mercury to be a sexpot, so, maybe I'm not the best one to ask.

[Marie Anzalone]

Ditto on Freddie mercury is a sexpot. I will not conjecture on ugliest man in R&R though. I will offer proof. An actual paid ad my late friend Dan showed me, in one of his porno mags: a close-up of Keith Richards' face, with the simple caption, "sometimes, drugs don't actually kill you."

[jkhatz]

Keith Richards, yeah. Drugs destroyed that crazy b*****d. Now how about hottest? Of course, Freddie Mercury makes the top of the list, David Gilmour was fairly easy on the eyes, as was Roger Taylor. I won't even discuss the stupid hair band dudes like Bret Michaels, Jani Lane and Jack Russel. As far as I'm concerned, they can't even be considered for anything close to Rock and Roll.

[KAOlmsted]

God damn it, get off my f*****g thread xD

[jkhatz]

No. :D

[jkhatz]

KO, for you: http://www.myfacewhen.net/view/1648-noface

[KAOlmsted]

Ha! Thanks ;-) p.s. I think Mike Reno is smoking hot...and Bob Geldof...just saying. Now get the f**k off my thread xD

[jkhatz]

Bob Geldof has had some crazy accusations. Google his name along with the Michael Hutchence suicide. Crazy stuff. However, he was smokin' in "The Wall" and I have always loved, "I Don't Like Mondays."

[KAOlmsted]

Yikes, really?? I haven't actually ever googled him before...never occurs to me to do so. I'll jot it down on my long-a*s list of reference material to look up. Thanks. (and yeah, I love him in the video for Up All Night...I seem to recall a snake...)

[jkhatz]

Also, the whole Live Aid thing was said to be fabricated. "They" say he was using it for self promotion.

[N!LoC]

and my daily dose of testosterone has been optimized :-)

[Baby Ricochet]

Yes it has. Thanks N!LoC

[Souladareatease]

"Mean Machine" was my fave
fitting for this testosterone write!!!
excellence BR!!!

[Baby Ricochet]

Great song! Thanks for stopping by soul

[Corset]

omgosh this is hilarious because this morning my boss was complaining about her husband and I said Men are just boys in bigger clothes, they love toys, gadgets of all kinds. lol...I bet you gots lotsa gadgets :0

[Baby Ricochet]

Not to many though I will confess my girlfriend has snatched my phone out of my hand before and thrown it in her purse because I was on it instead of being present with her and whatever we were doing. Guess what site I was on.

[Corset]

WC?

[Baby Ricochet]

Of Course

[Will]

If anyone is gonna know what makes a man, it's Lemmy f*****g Kilmister. But in all seriousness, I like the message here. It has a great tone about it, as always professionally combining seriousness and humor. The flow can use some work, a syllable added here or subtracted there, but a solid piece overall. Great work.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you will. I wrote it in like 20 minutes and just threw it out there. Mostly I just wanted to post a photo of Lemmy. Lemmy is the MAN.

[Will]

Anything with Lemmy is great, it the poem itself was fantastic. Keep it up, man.

[Angi]

I like the content of this! Made me laugh and made me nod my head. I love a good, strong man that can take of s**t!

[RachelReaper]

XD you're funny :)

[Baby Ricochet]

:)

[Delaney]

This is quite humorous, but I like more the carefree feeling about it. It's kind of like, "this is who I am and if you don't like it, f-off." It's very admirable, and as I said, quite humorous. Nicely done. :)

Yours truly, Delaney

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Delaney

[quinfinn]

a tougher question there isn't except "what is a woman" but i ain't got time for all that right now cause i don't think theres enough room....i think a man is what nature defines as the bearer of the seed to create life, other than that he can be any damned thing he chooses to be..size and looks are determined by genetics but character is defined by nurture..so if a man is not what you think he should be ask his mom and pop what the f**k they did wrong. good write, ricochet!

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Quinfinn

[Frieda P]

Just the title itself cracked me up, so I knew what I was in for....true to form, you tell like it is. Ha, I've never been able to figure that out, I had four of them to deal with, and even when they grew to be men, they were still little boys, so you got me! Good one Mark...

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you frieda

[TL Boehm]

What is a man? I don't know for sure but my house is infested with them. Oh the horror of white socks, 1st person shooter games, and various foodstuffs slurped from the original package sans flatware and lets not even begin to address my lamentations about the "throne of ultimate power" that is never pristine. All that being said, I kinda like 'em, cuz I'm a girl. Yup! This was a great poem. Made me smile

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you TL. I'm glad you enjoyed it