The Dirty Sanchez Post

What Baby Ricochet did

"I blocked you cause you're a piece of s**t w***e who's begging me for a dirty sanchez you whiny little b***h. You're a f*****g piece of s**t no talent parasite who's a miserable disgrace to the human experience and if I ever have the pleasure of meeting you in person I'd a*s f**k you so Goddamn hard I'd make you my little b***h you f*****g piece of s**t cum dumpster Oh I know how much you want Ricochet's man meat in your mouth. You dirty little no talent w***e. Hmmmm."

My post to jkhatz. There's lots more but I haven't read it because I got blocked for some reason.  I'm blocked or blocking so many writers right now I need a Goddamn graph and pie chart to figure this s**t out. I'm being called all sorts slanderous things and that's by people I haven't blocked yet. I'm sure the s**t I haven't seen is f*****g golden.

    Boys and girls I'm not going to make an excuse for this because It's inexcusable. No one should be posting the kind of vulgar threats I posted on jkhatz thread for any reason. I had been drinking at the time and alcohol does have the unfortunate effect of turning me into a belligerent royal a*****e at the worst of times and my "dirty Sanchez" post was one of those times. I knew from reading jkhatz rants she was looking for a fight so I thought "I'll give her a good one" so I kicked the s**t out of her hornets nest and oh did I ever get stung but ya know what, I pretty much deserve it. This isn't the first time in my life my mouth (or in this case key board) has gotten me into a world of s**t and tragically it's not likely to be the last. If I actually survive the s**t Tsunami that's presently drowning me on the WC and don't end up blocking well over half the community to keep them from shitting all over my page remind me not to do such incredibly stupid, low brow, no class things on the this site again. Thank you

Baby Ricochet.

Reviews

[bob, small b. aka invs]

my opinion of you vascillates about as much as your personality does on here. my personal opinion is that you're a damaged individual who copes in the ways he knows, which aren't always socially acceptable. hell, we're all damaged one way or another. it's a matter of degrees.
the fact is, i think you're capable of being a hellova writer. some of your work is astoundingly good and insightful. my problem is that i cannot abide bullying and you, at times, are a true bully. trying to intimidate people like jkhatz with the most outrageous thoughts and threats. so what do i do? my inclination is to simply block you. i abhore when people do nothing because "well, he's always been nice to ME'. which you have. but you've been horrible to others and at some point, decent people have to stop tolerating that. then again, you have seen the problem you created and have apologized and tried to make it right. there has to be something in that. decent people should also be able to forgive.
so i'm still on the fence. not sure what to do. i guess i'll ponder some more before i do anything.

[Baby Ricochet]

invs of all the comments that have been made about this incident this is without doubt the most intelligent, insightful and spot on of them all. Thank you.

[Frieda P]

She's not gone, she's lurking in the background, she's sent me several private messages to explain why her so-called yellow bellied friend blitzed the boards here....I'm still not convinced it's not her under another assumed name. She said this was the most fun she's had online. Let's not play into her hands or anyone else who upsets the standards here.

[Baby Ricochet]

Glad she enjoyed herself. I didn't. Oh well. It's my own damn fault. Hopefully it's over.

[Frieda P]

You took the high road and rectified your mistake, that's all that matters now...

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Why not unblock her and let your page open for communication Baby R. I think it is a little move from your side then everything will be settled. Besides we are all human born to make mistakes. I think as far as I know her, you can meet halfway and start talking to end this feud.

[Frieda P]

Or you could cut your nose off....less painful.

[redflutterby]

I don't think she wants to talk...at least not productively. As Frieda said she is enjoying this. And there was plenty of inciting going on from her side before BR blew up. Sometimes that's what people want...to incite and sit back to watch the ensuing melee.

[J. J. Nightingale]

Conscience choices are not MISTAKES .. especially if we say we might even do it again ... hummm such goings on ..

[Marie Anzalone]

Here is what I wrote as my review on the piece this review is written on; I think it is worth reposting here... because we, as a society, have gotten into the habit of violent anonymous attacks being the norm; of thinking it is ok.

A batterer also almost always says he is sorry, he was out of control, it will never happen again. Stats say a woman is killed in America every hour or so by people who swear it will never happen again. This is NOT about finger pointing- it is about introspection. Why are folks defending hate speech as a "public mistake?" and attacking the victim of it? To say that someone enjoys the shame of being targeted in this way is morally questionable and frankly disgusts me.

[Marie Anzalone]

Here is the actual review I mentioned above:

I think it is important to differentiate between discourse of differing opinions, defending oneself, and hate speech. It is especially important to do this on-line, because we have cultured a level of tolerance of personal attacks, disguising it as freedom of speech, that we would not tolerate in real life.

Since 1993, hate speech has been classified as falling into 2 categories:

*Speech that advocates or encourages violent acts or crimes of hate.
*Speech that creates a climate of hate or prejudice, which may in turn foster the commission of hate crimes.

which is further broken down into four categories. Of those four, Baby Ricochet's "review" falls into 2 of those categories:

*Divisive language
*Dehumanizing metaphors

it begs some interesting questions for an online setting. If someone said to jkhatz what this individual said, in real life, jkhatz would be within their rights to solicit a restraining order.

and then here is what is even more disturbing to me:

1. Two people gave this "review" a thumbs-up
2. jk has been attacked for "stirring the pot," essentially saying they deserved the attack for instigating it
3. jk has been advised by well-meaning folks to simply let it go, as the other is simply expressing an opinion

Folks, there is a huge disconnect here. Saying someone is a bad writer, a grammatical buffoon, acting like a baby; or even that they have the literary ability of a 5 year-old- these are expressing opinions, whether founded or not. Free forums are made for the purpose of expressing opinions, and debating facts- no matter how much you disagree with them or wish they were not true.

There is a world of difference between that and threatening someone with assault, violence, rape, degradation, and wishing someone dead or worse. That is speech meant to intimidate a person, make them feel violated to their core. It is speech meant to incite violence, threaten them, and exclude them socially based on who they are. It is shaming speech- and one can make a very valid argument that it has no business in a public discussion forum.

If it makes you feel sick, or sad, or overwhelmed to read it- well it should. It proves that you are still human. Here is the thing- you cannot have it both ways. Without the ability to have some level of control over the way people treat you on a discussion forum, it will quickly spiral until nobody feels safe. Hate speech is not protected under the First Amendment in the US, and is equally not tolerated in many other countries.

I have been on-site for 5 years. I remember how it used to be- a very welcoming and warm community, and I received a lot of support before the personal attacks began. When those attacks escalated, it was too painful to stay on site, and I left or was only marginally active for a long time. I stay under the radar for the most part, and I realize now that a lot of that was fear of escalation of attacks, and shame I felt for the social ostracism I experienced.

I will never claim to be anything near the site's best writer (there IS a lot of earnest talent on this site) but I am also nowehere near its worst. I interact on here because the interactions are stimulating, because I get inspired, and because over 5 years I can also call several folks genuine real-life or virtual friends. But it is becoming very clear to me that a flaw in the setup of thise site is the lack of a code of conduct or ethics that we must follow. To have the privilege of the free feedback of 1000's of creative people, we should not have to be told that we have the RESPONSIBILITY TO TREAT EACH OTHER WITH AN IOTA OF RESPECT.

We also have to distinguish between genuine righteous outrage (which needs to be tolerated) and hate speech (which never should be tolerated in a public forum). This is admittedly a tough call to make sometimes. Buut we cannot tell someone they deserve to live in fear of personal attacks, or that they deserve to be threatened, or that they should live in fear of ruffling the wrong feathers. That is disempowering to the people standing on the side of right.

[Steven]

To degrade mediocre writers on one of the only venues they have to support and celebrate each other is terrible, and pointless. It achieves one thing, which is of no benefit to the antagonist. And so then she gets punched in the eye. Whether it's 'okay' or not isn't the issue. Things like that will inevitably happen to someone like her. I feel no pity. If she was a he, I don't think you would either.

[Marie Anzalone]

your response does not even make sense in context. and the last time I went online in defense of someone was to defend a MALE friend against unfounded accusations of plagiarism. Yes, the fact she is a woman makes it more sensitive- the comments can be construed as hate speech against a particular minority group. Threatening rape is a serious and illegal offense. Also clearly against terms of use for this site.

[J. J. Nightingale]

I agree with you .. that whole statement made no sense at all .. And I agree with EVERYTHING you just wrote !!

[Steven]

Of course you agreed. And it makes perfect sense in context, or out of it, or randomly written in a newspaper column, or even in a bathroom stall or church flyer...

[J. J. Nightingale]

I agree with MARIE ... not YOU !

[Steven]

Oh Jeebus...

[Baby Ricochet]

Steven you're my bro but there's no defending the dirty Sanchez post or me for making it. Marie Azalone is correct in her assessment. It was violent hate speech and I gotta live with the fall out for being the a*****e that posted it. You should read some of the PM'S I got for it. Marie and J J are being nice by comparison. Maybe I should take up needle point or paint bunny rabbits or some s**t instead of posting crap on the WC cause it's gonna take a loooong time to live this one down.

[Steven]

I hear you, and am not disagreeing that your remarks were out of line, but her post up there was as well, basically leveling you with someone who seriously threatens rape, etc. It's verbose and over the top and begging the question.

[Baby Ricochet]

Well no of course I wasn't serious. I've never physically harmed or coerced a woman into sex my life but these people don't know me from Adam. You put something like that out on the web and it's some scarey s**t to a lot of folks, particularly women. In my drunken head at the time I was thinking "Oh this person wants a villain so I'll give her Snidely Whiplash on the WC." That was an ignorant thing for me to do and now I gotta take my beatings for it.

[Steven]

and fyi to her, women are not a 'minority group.' Especially not on here. Just reveals more of her line of reasoning.

[Steven]

Sure, in your shoes. But I'm not going to read drivel and nod.

[Baby Ricochet]

Well thank you Steven. I appreciate your input.

[Ees]

uhhggg. who is the person with the pastoral looking picture? I don't think I like them. ahhh, you sound like one of my idiot friends' gender studies professors that I continuously debate with on facebook. Get over it. And by the way the internet is not real. Stated violence is not real violence. And those women who get beat in real life take it. They can get out. They don't have to accept it. If a man hit me, he'd be done. They deserve to be beat the second time for sticking around.



and you threatened free speech in your statements. That also gets me pretty riled up.

hate speech is speech. and I will say whatever I want. If it is hateful or not. People need to stop being such wusses. God, I hate wusses.

If there were a code of conduct on this site I would not be a part of it, lady. I don't do rules. I never have. I don't even follow laws. You think that I would start in the imaginary internet world?

[J. J. Nightingale]

Clean, decent, law abiding people are not "wusses" .. but you wouldn't understand that .. being none of them..

[Frieda P]

I keep getting dragged back kicking and screaming to this thread, could we please lay it to rest now, point taken by all...it was a heartfelt apology, who here hasn't fucked up? Give it a break now............

[J. J. Nightingale]

LOL .. I agree .. I saw 14 comments .. I was like what ..? .. But sometimes you just have to comment.. or burst ... Have a good day ..LOL :) I am DONE !

[Frieda P]

Oh good, we're finally on the same page...PEACE & all that jazz lol... ;-)

[Marie Anzalone]

Ricochet, I want to give you a salute for writing an honest apology on this thread that acknowledges the harm your words did to the recipient. That is not easy to do, and you are a greater man for doing it. Thank you for doing that. I cannot tell you how much I personally appreciate your efforts to make this right.

Frieda, I think you are missing most of the point.

Steven... all I can say is that your personal attacks on me are baseless and greatly uninformed.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Marie

[Marie Anzalone]

you're welcome, Ricochet.

[Frieda P]

So what's your point, he was attacked, he re-acted in retaliation to heavy, repeated character assassination....he was big enough to realize his mistakes, how much further can you take this...

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

:) Hi Frie :)

[J. J. Nightingale]

Thought "WE" were done here .... LOL ... " I tried to get out, but they kept pulling me back in"

[Frieda P]

OMG tell me about it....! Hiya Marc ;-)

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Frieda has a point that we should move on, why some people here kept the ball rolling? all the points already presented on the table and the involved person already accept the mistakes. Do we have to discuss another point to incite another chaos? I think it is pointless anymore. Peace is love.

[Ees]

To follow a law or a rule simply because it exists and not because it is you true heart would in fact make you a total wuss. I follow some laws... like I don't kill people. That isn't because the law exists, it is because I don't believe in killing.

[Frieda P]

Good to know Erin lol

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

You don't believe in killing because that is your heart and mind desired which is above the law and norms or society. That is yourself who has love, if there is love we can't kill or even abused others.

[Ees]

That was in response to the earlier statement about law abiding citizens being clean and not wusses. I just don't believe that.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Yeah :) me either :)

[J. J. Nightingale]

Sorry I am so finished .. this has turned into "the children's hour" Grrrrr

[J. J. Nightingale]

And they need to change their diapers .. and attitudes ... >>

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

The Mother should change the diapers not the baby himself :) where is the sense? lol I am just kidding.

[Ees]

You can be done. Nobody is forcing you to continuously reply.
I mean it isn't like a law or anything.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

I agree :)

[James William Dyer]

LOL!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dirty_Sanchez_%28sexual_act%29

[James William Dyer]

So, in a dirty sanchez...is the shut mutually wiped across each partner's lips, or do they take turns. Or is this s**t smear moustached on the submissive one. Is the s**t obtained from an already detached t**d, or is the s**t smear obtained as the feces falls from the givers a*s into the reciever's mouth....I don't understand how someone making guppy motions with a s**t lip is sexually appealing.....this must be an urban legend.

[Marie]

I thought I knew what a "dirty Sanchez was", but apparently I didn't. I'm not particularly glad to know now...

[Frieda P]

Wow learn something new every day around this place....

[J. J. Nightingale]

J. W. D. .. You would know ..

[J. J. Nightingale]

And I didn't care to know either ..

[Marie]

You can learn so much on the Interenet...and sometimes it's more information than you required...

[Ees]

There is no way that...
ahhh
nevermind.
In real life these are the sort of things that my boys say and then refuse to tell me what they mean.
They always think of me as the innocent little girl. I suppose this is going to bring that to a close...

[Baby Ricochet]

Dirty Sanchez. Fecal mustache on the submissive one when that person brings the dominant one to orgasm orally after the dominant one has had unclean anal sex with said person. It can be a gay or straight.

[Ees]

see, I can completely repeat my above statement.

[Marie]

Thank you for posting this so that we all could see it. I now know everything I was trying not to know.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

:) Ms. Marie Dirty Sanchez is bad in our health LOl :)

[Holly Mason]

when cornered all comes out
this is a very open ,I fudged up letter, and I thank you for being able to pen it

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you for reading it Holly.

[James William Dyer]

I forget what a "dirty sanchez" is, but I remember hearing about it in a bar, and I remember it was disgusting. I'll have to google it.

[Baby Ricochet]

Google

[Marie]

Well,jkhatz is gone. Not necessarily your fault. The situation got out of hand, and everyone should have stepped back before it did. Next time maybe there won't be a next time....

[Baby Ricochet]

Before I started sucking down the Vodka I had her blocked and that was that but NO. I had to get loaded and see what she was saying about me. Stupid, stupid stupid Mark. Stupid boy.

[Marie]

We all make mistakes. Some manage to make worse mistakes than others...

[Jack...]

We all say stupid things at times and I will grant you, this was not one of the smartest moves I've seen, but we are all human and we do make mistakes. Now, that being said, I can not sit here and tell you exactly what I would have done or said had I been attacked, by name, like you were. There was something brewing on this site that had nothing to do with you and out of nowhere, a sniper took a shot at Tate and hit you in the process, so I completely understand you going into attack mode. I am sure I may have chosen a different dialogue to fight back with, but all of us are different. Once again I think it takes a big person to admit when they have made a mistake. Good job.

[Baby Ricochet]

Oh I'm wearing a dunce cap that says ABSOLUT VODKA on it for this. Thanks Jack.

[Steven]

Hahaha.. who?!

[Baby Ricochet]

If ya missed it yer a lucky boy

[Steven]

Luck comes in many forms. That s**t is fun though. Not sure why you feel bad about it. I wish someone would f**k with me.

[James William Dyer]

LOL. I'd take this and twist it into a rant-type narrative, like doestoevsky's "notes from the underground".....but I'd aim the hatred at the mass stupidity in the human race.

[Baby Ricochet]

This was a WC beef that got WAY outa hand I had a address. I'd rather be writing poems.