Marked

In one square shot moment
My life was forever changed
By a kid who fired an RPG
Playing grown up war games

With all my innocence lost
With the sound of a rifle crack
and the splatter from my weapon
Telling me I can't have it back

Bleeding out on a concrete floor
Found him on the last house sweep
Staring up dead eyed at me
His last few breaths he couldn't keep

Nothing in that brutal game
No one for the rest of my days
Knows what was in my head
As I watched his life ebbing away

Staring down at his bearded face
I was surprised to feel no pity
Compassion was overshadowed 
As something dark crawled into me

It was a silent eerie curse
as subtle as it was stark
I felt it deep into my bones
I knew that I was marked

I had crossed the line of death
Dealt it out with a vengeful toll
 I knew for the rest of my days
His death would be on my soul

It burned a hole deep into me
To the marrow of my bones
To my last strand of DNA
Death had been atoned

There was an empty feeling
Someone said it was shock
Standing over his dying body
I didn't know how to take stock

and we turned and walked away
left his body to be found
lying dead on a concrete floor
Dropped by my M4 rounds

Author's Note

Being hit by an ambush meant chasing hajji and securing the area so it was common to come across dead and wounded hajjis that you had just shot. It wasn't the most comfortable feeling in the world, that's for Goddamn sure.I'm gonna share something that may sound silly to you but it's one of the things that bothered me about seeing the younger ones get killed. Most of them weren't married and in their culture that meant they were virgins. It seemed to me a cruel fate for a young man to die a virgin. It's just one of those things I guess

Reviews

[KAOlmsted]

I've read this no less than five times now, hoping I might have something to say at the end of each reading, but the truth is, I don't. Not because the piece didn't move me, rather because it did. And I recognize there is absolutely nothing I could say that could possibly come close to how deeply sorry I am that you had to live through this. So. There you go. Exceptional write. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Kimmer

[KAOlmsted]

Always my pleasure...

[AYVID N]

You'll carry it forever with you Baby. That's because you have a heart.
Thanks for sharing your profound sadness with us.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Divya

[Michael G.]

Excellent and profound.

I know this may be a stretch; but, perhaps you are here today and he isn't so you can relate this story to others in hopes that one day, no one has to be in either position.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Mr G.

[Marie]

It's a cruel fate for anyone to die. Perhaps he didn't choose his fate; perhaps he was forced into it...but it all ends up the same.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Marie

[Lover Of Words]

Ive read this many times and with knowing people in my own generation doing what you chose to do i have to say its a big courageous any man could ever do.. And i am proud that you were brave enough to fight for the country.. I am glad to know a great man of your nature Baby... This is an touching and spectacular piece... No one knows what you went though back on that day but there are many people who do understand and i am grateful that you shared this life changing piece with us so that we all get a piece of your life... Thanks for sharing

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Kelsey

[Lover Of Words]

Your welcome Baby

[quinfinn]

never having killed another human being, i can't possibly comprehend what it feels like. i only know that i feel privileged to have never known. i guess it is a whole new set of rules when you are in live fire fights and combat zones...it is kill or be killed, i understand that. maybe, just maybe, you should console yourself in the concept that you were protecting the lives of yourself and others. this is i very deep and resonant piece of writing for you ricochet. it makes me proud to call you friend. thank you for your service, troop!

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Quinfinn

[quinfinn]

i am honored to know you....sincerely

[Cara]

it is not silly to me, for it bothers me too
i mean there are people that are dying in my city every day ,most of them are not only virgins but are children too
hate the feeling, loved the poem
thank you for sharing

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Cara

[Cara]

:D

[Pete Langley]

Thank you for sharing this, Mark - and I hope it helped you a bit in the sharing. Like Frieda , I cannot imagine the direct impact your experience has, but it must be profound. P.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Pete

[Frieda P]

I can't imagine what that must feel like, and I'm not even sure what to say....I just know from reading you that you have a huge heart Mark, you think you're a hardass but it shows in each of your reads what you're really made of. It's been my pleasure to read and watch as you've let us peek into a bit of your life. Thanks for sharing this one.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Frieda