Girlfriend in the shower

My girlfriend's in the shower
She'll take about an hour
I'll f**k around with my phone
See if anyone's home
Check up on writerscafe
What crap got posted today
Some RRs in my box
Review them maybe not
Some of them are good
Some just never should
Every jerkoff's a critic
Reviews that are acidic
Ricochet's flip remarks
That dipshit's just all bark
He doesn't have the bite
He doesn't know how to write
These rhymes just f*****g blow
And he doesn't seem to know
She turned her hair drier on
So I'll say so long
God what a crappy poem
Maybe I'll write zen koans

Reviews

["writing by" KS]

Hahaha ... Honest, nice. :))

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you KS. I've never known anyone who stays in the bathroom as long as she does and half the time I don't know what she's doing in there but it works for her.

["writing by" KS]

I'm pretty much the same, but I got say my man takes longer than me in the bathroom, but that's cos he takes his iPad in with him and always on bloody writers cafe lol.. actually we are like two peas in a pod then lol.
You're welcome ;)

[.]

Lol beautiful :) Women and showers are a horrible combo lol, especially if you want to take one after .

[Jamie Cook]

*rolls like a pencil laughing* XD YES! I loved this! Like.....no no words....just know I died laughing :3

[RachelReaper]

LOL.

[Tate Morgan]

Life has a way of intertwining with our writing. Yours are great because they speak to the soul of man. I doubt anyone reading your work would say you havent lived. Yours is an exciting life washed in the best of what a man can do. What we dont get from you are pityful excuses for inadiquacy. Yours are raw tellings of the truth. They remind me of the great Muddy Waters tune I'm A Man! They are real and stark. It allows us all to share in the truths that you call home. Thanks Ric.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Tate.

[Pax]

nope its not a crappy poem... its very clever and mind openning... I'm sure everyone can relate to that long shower... i think some girls really do that and take all the time to prepare... another clever one my friend...

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you mr pax

[N!LoC]

okay... did u really write this impromptu poem while ur (trick) *AHEM (cough cough) giRL Fr!end was in the shower?

[Baby Ricochet]

Yes I did. In a hotel room in Fort Lauderdale Florida on my phone while Lexus was doing whatever she does that takes her so long in the shower. I was taught to shower in one minute in the Marine corps and though I do take a tad longer now I've no clue why she takes so freaking long

[N!LoC]

oh rico rico rico... you are such u dude ... haha... a girl just wants to smell fresh and clean and look good for ya... lol

[Baby Ricochet]

I know and she does. I'm still a usmc grunt in a lot of ways though and if a shower goes over 10 minutes im like "what in the hell is going on in there? " My x wife was a girlie girl type too and she didn't take that long to take a shower. I never say anything about it but I don't get it

[Relic]

You do have a style of your own here on WC. I know because I've been here about 5 years. Some will not agree with your agressive attitude or your method of poetry but to me you certainly are unique for this site.

Whether the cursing is good for the younger audience I don't know, but I imagine they're not too phased by it living in this world today anyway.

I no longer judge poems the way I used to as far as elements of poetry and so forth so I'll end by saying this is a fine poem done in your own distinctive manner. Judging by your many reviews I'm sure others agree. Keep writing.

[Baby Ricochet]

Why thank you Mr Relic.

[Relic]

You're quite welcome sir.

[Marie]

It's not a crappy poem. But the last line is.
I don't know what your girlfriend's problem is--it takes me 15 inutes to shower, dress, put on make-up, give my cats fresh water and fill the food dish.

[Baby Ricochet]

I was taught to shower in one minute in the Marine corps so no I don't know why she takes that long either

[Michael of Gilead]

Put the phone down, walk away from the computer and go share a shower ;)

[saratogaparty]

Seconded!

[Michael of Gilead]

ha!

[Baby Ricochet]

Next time