Art Critic

   I was looking at a book of art
 I thought I needed some culture
      So we went to a museum
 and looked at stupid sculptures

   We went to the Guggenheim
   The building was pretty cool
   It looked like a big a*s tea pot
    Made out of a cable spool

  So we went inside the building
  I was prepared to be impressed
   The first exhibit that we saw
  looked like a maintenance mess

  About a Gazillion extension cords
   were strung around the room
The curator told some bullshit story
  About how it represented doom

Then there was the giant canvas
with the rope glued in the middle
Meant to represent the ties of man
  or some such fucked up riddle

There was some kind of mobile
   hanging around outside
it looked kinda like a taxi crash
  mixed with formaldehyde

Nothing looked like art to me
   It seemed to be a sham
The talent was in perpetrating
  An art scene Nuevo scam

  So I asked the bitchy lady
"Who comes up with this s**t?"
My 5 year old autistic cousin
  Would be an art scene hit

  She just glared into my face
   Like she needed a laxative
  Then she said in a snotty tone
  Sir you're not being imaginative

So I guess she had me pegged
  For a lowbrow philistine
I say you don't have to be told
what art's suppose to mean

You don't need a sales pitch
   To feel art in your gut
You know what it means to you
   That's what art's about

If someone has to sell the hype
of what art's suppose to mean
Maybe it's just a giant hoax
and a bullshit ponzi scheme

Reviews

[Tate Morgan]

You don't need a sales pitch
To feel art in your gut
You know what it means to you
That's what art's about

If someone has to sell the hype
of what art's suppose to mean
Maybe it's just a giant hoax
and a bullshit ponzi scheme


this is absolutely cool You see things as any man would Great

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Tate

[Tate Morgan]

Ive been there the museum its a hoot

[N!LoC]

this is a poem unlike any other i have ever read... giggle giggle.... :-)

[Samuel Dickens]

Exactly. You hit the nail on the head, my friend. I began drawing at 13 and continued that until the seventies, at which time I taught myself how to oil paint. I love art, but thank God have never been corrupted by formal training. I see that modern stuff about the same way you do. (It's garbage)

[Baby Ricochet]

I love art too. But what their selling as high art now? C'mon. Thank you for the review sam