Breath

what I don't have
while being chased

what is taken away
by a surprise

what catches
in mid-sentence

what I gasp for
as I drown

Reviews

[Red Brick Keshner]

Intermingling of images united by one thought - an extended version of what I fondly "categorise" for lack of a better concept, as 'western haiku.' Takes the breath away to read!

Out of breath, wind knocked out-gasping shock, breathing pause, survival instinct. The powerful image of a head splashing out of the depths, mouth agape, gasping for breath!

Btw, Good morning, after four hours of fitful sleep. I am up again. So here I am, after my poetry-fix. Lol. This is better than coffee!

Hope you are having a good day. How has it been so far in poetry land for you?

[Phillitup]

Thank you! 😃I'm glad you could envision it clearly. My poetry land is good today, how about you? Good morning!

[Red Brick Keshner]

Hey Dell, didn't sleep well, got a migraine BUT! Poetry is my drug of choice. I see you've been at it for hours. Man, your dedication and focus is superb. What an inspiration! Thanks for the pick-up. My day will be supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

[Phillitup]

It's 5:09 P.M. here in Florida

[Red Brick Keshner]

Hopefully a nice wintery sunset... that is a vision. :-)

[Toni]

Very Nice...
xoxo

[Phillitup]

thank you very much!

[quinfinn]

wonderfully done. such alacrity in so few words.

[Falling Leaf.]

Ciao,

This is really cool, and I agree that it could be a riddle. Awesome write!

Arrivederci!

[Phillitup]

Thanks

[Falling Leaf.]

My pleasure! :D

Arrivederci!

[Sami Khalil]

A unique interesting write.

[Phillitup]

Thank you

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:0

[disheveledApathy]

If Gollum knew this riddle, he would definitely ask Bilbo it. (And I know its not a riddle, but it should be.)

[Phillitup]

Thanks

[mary green]

without the title, this could very well be a riddle one of those magic gatekeepers ask wanderers to solve in order to progress on their journey. :)

[Night]

...imaginative write...well done.:)

[Phillitup]

Thank you!

[J Todd Underhill]

Wonderful write I liked it from start to finish!

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

brilliant!

[Phillitup]

thanks