Warm

Even the hottest of fires won’t make me warm this winter. Without you sitting beside me, I can’t breathe. I said I could make it, life would go on. I deceived myself for selfish reasons. It’s my own fault that now you are not mine. Were you ever in the first place? I have no clue. This season, I’m just seeking a future. As I stare outside and the freezing air bights my face before I close the window, I want to be warm. The cold outside is better than not having you. The arctic breeze that pushes me to endless gates and telephone poles. As I try my hardest to grab hold of my world, it keeps spinning me out if control. If you were beside me, the wind would stop. The breeze would be gentle and life would exist as a happy place. No. I’ve got to move on. Onward from the dream that you will come back to me. Away from the thought that you are merely where I cannot see you. These thoughts and dreams stab me, they hurt. I am trying to force lies upon myself, I can’t give in to the power that you have over me. It wouldn’t be right. It wouldn’t be fair. You chose for it to be this way, right? I’ve done nothing wrong, please? Say I am not lying. Say that I speak the truth. I beg for me to be nothing but a shadow of memory that never did anything to make this happen. I know that I am, though. I know that I did this, you didn’t really choose for it to be this way, I’ve done everything wrong. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the choices you agreed to and the accusations that are shot back and forth like bullets. I’m sorry if you’re hurting, I am too. I want you back. I want the warmth of having you near, of you being mine and me being yours. I am desperate. I try every minute to pull myself back in, back together. I try my hardest to let me live my own life. I can be free of you, so why won’t I let myself? The memory of you is the cause, the thoughts are to blame. Not you or me. It’s the thoughts. The thoughts were why this started, why I feel the sharp chill. It’s the thoughts. So please say no or yes...I just want to be happy this winter, I want to be warm.

Author's Note

I just wrote this off the whim. It's a short story about thoughts messing with someones ability to live and love. It's not based off of a true story. Please leave reviews!
Best regards,
Dell

Reviews

[Bluefire]

This is very good, It made me think of a broken hearted man sitting atop a bench with old fashioned street lights on either side of that bench,
all consumed in his thoughts and emotions as his body grows cold, for snow is falling.
Very well done, I like this piece! ^^

[CreativeStroke]

You are very good with writing pieces that many people can relate to so easily. The maturity in your writing is refreshing for me to read.
I have one correction and one suggestion for you in this piece, "freezing air bights my face" the word 'bights' should actually be spelled 'bites'.
My suggestion is breaking your writing up into paragraphs... but this is just a suggestion. I think it would make this piece a little easier to read, but I enjoyed it anyway. :)
Another fabulous write!

[Andorianskye]

i love this, mostly becuase its realistic also because it is good, great even.

[Icelanna]

Awesome. Not a bad thing to say about this. It's very heartfelt, passionate and has a good sense of longing. Well done!
Love to you x

[de_maruf]

beautiful

[Rachel Hanne]

Aw I love this. I've had a messed up relationship (only, it wasn't my fault at all...) so it's neat seeing this from a different view ( now I am not sure in real life it's like this of course). It brought tears to my eyes!

[s y e]

Love is a very powerful emotion! You have captured the emotion very well! Great job!

[Phillitup]

Thanks

[s y e]

Anytime!

[quinfinn]

well, true or not, it certainly hits home. i know these feelings and i have asked myself over and over again all those agonizing questions. love is a powerful emotion and the loss of love is like going cold turkey with withdrawal symptoms from a burning drug addiction. you have penned this well. i salute you for your depth and all encompassing empathy....

[Phillitup]

thank you very much! I appreciate your review!
-Dell

[Shaylynn H.]

I'm a tough critic - ask any one who's whined "I don't care what you think!". I like it though, it's passionate and real.

I guess as some one who's ruined a relationship I understand it.

It's well written and it connects to people.

Best of luck,
-S

[Phillitup]

I have heard of you which is why I sought you out. I feel that having someones true opinion is better for my writing and helps me improve (which is always good). I recently made a friend who is a VERY tough critic but I have listened to advice and considered everything. I appreciate your compliments! Thanks again!
-Dell

[Shaylynn H.]

How did you hear about me? Complainers? Lol

[Phillitup]

No. I was reading someones poem and stumbled upon one of your reviews (you actually enjoyed the poem) and so I read a piece of your work and the "about me" box which I do before I friend anyone. I'm glad you accepted! haha...:)

[Shaylynn H.]

No problem! Feel free to go read my stuff and comment! I crave feedback. Haha.