Reminders

This isn't really a story, mainly a reflection on the things of the past that just might make me smile again like an innocent child. Within these memories...that's exactly what I was.

I was reading a story that was posted and it brought me all the way from Florida, my current home, to upstate New York, where my father grew up. My dad grew up on a dairy farm. Lots of land, cute little house. It was old. He and his little sister shared an attic room. Dusty, and unpleasant due to their quarrels. Sometimes, when I was little, and even now, when I ask, he tells me stories about when he was growing up. One day he jumped from a deck on the farm, sprained his ankle. Didn't go to the doctor until a few days later. I took a long time to heal. Often times in the summer, when we go on our annual trip to Canada, where my mother grew up, we'll stop by and visit the farms current owners. They aren't elderly, but at the same time, they aren't young. They used to have a tiny little goat, they named him freckles because of his brown freckles all over his white face. On our half-hour visits, Freckles would follow me and my sister closely. His bleating reminded me of joy somehow. In a messed up sound, there was peace. The farm reminded me of when my Nana was alive. Her mini farm. She only h ad a garden, but she had  a lot of land. We have family videos of me playing with toys inside. I even remember my mom laying exhausted in a bed at the cabin one time. We watched movies and rode tricycles. My cousins and I would sit on the huge swing, I'm the youngest, so I'll never know what it's like to sit on that swing (it now lives in my aunts backyard) with a younger cousin. I remember eating tiny, wild strawberries. Straight from the ground. I also remember picking fresh raspberries with everyone. One day, my twin and cousin got stung by a bee while collecting berries. My sister got stung on the knee, she cried a lot. My cousin got stung in the back of his head. He cried longer, and much harder. IN those times, it was hard to cry. Swinging in a hammock, giggling. Today, it's easy. My Nana and other grandma are dead. So is a little boy I knew. I've moved from Missouri to Florida. I've learned a lot about sadness. But these reminders of those happy, carefree times...there what make me smile again.

Author's Note

:)

Reviews

[Ees]

Hey! I made you think of this eh!? Awesome, I am glad that I did!!!
My dad grew up on a farm, sometimes I ask him for stories, but those ones are usually about driving the tractor to school or being a tough guy, in the 1950s,(I am sure my dad is quite a bit older than yours) with the white t-shirt and the pointed boots or the time he was shot by his brother-in-law and Sys Brown had to doctor him up... haha. NOW you have made me think of other things and reminisce about them! This could be a never-ending cycle!!!


something got a little messed up in this sentence: "hey are elderly, but at the same time, they aren't young."

"but she had LOTS of land."- be careful when writing stories of using devices like capitalization. In a poem it can emphasize, but for some reason in a story it tends to read as young or cheesy. I am not trying to be insulting, because I don't think that your story is young or cheesy at all, I just think you should be careful with those sorts of things because they have a tendency of turning people off.

" wild mini strawberries" -wild strawberries are always mini, you may want to phrase it like: "tiny, wild strawberries."

The end is sad, but it's also life. That is what all people must learn. But there is so much good to come too. Imagine having kids and grandkids someday and being able to give them memories like the ones that you have!!!

This was nice, I enjoyed reading it, though I think that it would have been better if it was broken down into paragraphs. I also wish you had expanded on the story of your dad and his ankle. What was the outcome of not visiting the doctor for several days? This was well done. Makes everyone I am sure think about different things from their childhoods.

[Phillitup]

Thank you very much! I'm not a very experienced writer...I changed some of the things that you commented on.

Life tends to have happy and sad angles to it...that in itself os very true.

Yes, you did give me the idea. I told you, I get inspired by tons of things, little and small.

I appreciate your time! :)

[Ees]

Writing does take lots of time to get a handle on. I am not certain I know what I am doing and I got through high school and a million college English classes!!!
I think everybody gets inspired by all different things, I was only giving you some good-humored teasing in there!

Life is Good and Bad, Beautiful and Ugly and you can't know one without the other! I read a really strange book a while ago, I don't know if you could relate to it at all, it was called Headz and it was kind of about the hippie festival scene... How the outsiders think of festivals as a places of peace, love and getting high, but that's not what it really is. Every festival is a microcosm of the world and the good becomes better and the bad becomes worse. It's a battleground. That plays out summer after summer to extremes. I love experiencing that and reading about it that way. I feel like it makes me appreciate things more. It also helps one navigate a festival if they remember that it is such a battleground

[Phillitup]

Interesting.....:)

[Ees]

I guess you'll get there in some years. I shouldn't rush you. I do find it interesting myself. Hahah, I guess that is why I shared it. It's been a lot of fun chatting with you!

[Phillitup]

You too! When I first joined Writers Cafe, I was intimidated by you. One of my friends got me to join the website and he mentioned that you were one of the top reviewers. Anyway, your really nice...:) Do you know by any chance how the top writers and reviewers are selected?

[Ees]

I do not know. I have been wondering the same thing myself. I can't believe that anybody would be intimidated by me! I'm a disaster! I just read and review a lot of things on here, I think it comes down to a total count. I know that there are some people who don't like my reviews, because I don't automatically give compliments. But what use is this site if you are only here to get praise? I joined because I wanted to hear feedback on what I had written, so I give feedback in the same way that I want to get it. Thanks for thinking that I am nice. I'm not particularly nice, though, I'm just me. I'm not mean either... Somewhere in between and always trying to be fair. You're a pretty great writer and I have been having a good time reading some of your stuff as well as commenting back and forth with you!

[Phillitup]

I accept all reviews...I honestly want to know what people think. I'm also not afraid to try to help someone's writing.

[Ees]

That's awesome!
I try to too! Some people can miss the point that you were trying to make, maybe because we all come from different backgrounds, so you shouldn't automatically accept what people say, but take it into consideration. I honestly like to know what people are thinking as they read my stuff too!

[Phillitup]

:)

[RachelReaper]

it reminds me of something someone told me one time. they said to remember them with a smile and not tears. For some reason your story reminded me of that, thank you.

[Phillitup]

no, thank YOU!

[marie]

great flow to it loved the part about the goat so cute!!! :)

[ms. barrie]

aw the sweet taste of nostalgia . very well written, descriptive of one reminiscing

of memories that have warmed the heart. thanks for sharing :)

[David Scott]

Enjoyed the trip down memory lane. Your story writing is notbasstrong as your poetry though. Some of the sentences felt choppy to me. Also, several times, you used prepositional phrases that were not tied to a clear noun. It felt like a common question in grammar at times. How would you diagram the sentence, "A good time was had by all" ? An example from the story would be, "Dusty, and unpleasant due to their quarrels".
Anyhow, I liked it and I am just trying to be helpful. My spelling and grammar errors are rampant...

[Phillitup]

Thanks for the help. I feel like these memories are meant to be a bit choppy. Thanks though for the help if they weren't.

[Brookypoo]

very good keep writing

[Phillitup]

:)

[Brookypoo]

:) very good

[Sid]

Nice reminisce, brings back my own childhood, but you are right as we grow up all those moments become nothing more than memories, but memories we can cherish and they do bring a smile on our faces. But I have to ask about this line
"They are elderly, but at the same time, they aren't young"
if they are elderly then obviously they aren't young, so not sure what you wanted to imply, I'm guessing it should either be "aren't'" instead or "are" or "are" instead of "aren't"...otherwise a good write!!

[Phillitup]

Well, they not old or young, they are middle aged essentially. Thank you for your read and review. It's greatly appreciated! :)