The Diner

A Story by Delilah Noelle

A short story I wrote for a creative writing class

Her breathing was heavy now. She had to have been running for over a half hour, at least, but there was no way she was going to stop. Not until she was as far away as she could get. She stopped recognizing the streets ten minutes before, but she didn’t care where she went. As long as it was away. It had been pouring when she left that house. It still was. Her clothes were cold and heavy against her skin. She could see the air before her face form into a small cloud each time she breathed a jagged breath. Her breath. The only warm thing left to her. But soon even that warmth would be gone. Her body trembled as she ran. Not only because she was far beyond cold, but because of the pain and anger that dwelled inside of her. She hated them. Hated them all. She couldn’t just let it go as she always had, and she didn’t know why. She didn’t want to feel this way. She didn’t like it. Serenity. That’s all she ever wanted. All she had ever hoped for. Why has she always been denied this one thing? The only thing she had ever truly wanted. Besides him, of course. She’d always given up everything for those she cared for and never asked for anything in return, so why couldn’t she have this?

The already gray sky grew darker as if the sun and the moon had completely disappeared. She had been looking to the moon while she ran, but she had lost it in the midst of trying to get her long curly hair that clung to her face, out of the way. The only thing that lit the streets now were the street lights and the occasional car passing by. It was late. She wasn’t sure how late, but it was late enough that there were few people out driving. She never understood why so few people were out at night. It was so beautiful to her. The seemingly endless dark sky lit by the millions of stars that shined so bright. And the moon. The moon captivated her the most. She wasn’t exactly sure why, for she was always unsure of many things, but it had always held tightly to her interest since before she could remember. It was the only thing that gave her the slightest sense of the serenity she yearned for.

She now ran past a house that looked similar to that of which she grew up in all those years ago. And suddenly she was overwhelmed by her emotions and could no longer keep them at bay. She was grateful for the pouring rain then. For it concealed the tears now streaming down her face. She couldn’t remember the last time she let herself fall apart like this, and for a brief moment, she stopped running. She could feel the sob rising in her throat and it pained her to hold it back, but there was no way she’d let it go that far. She knew how to control her emotions. She had learned to do so and she wasn’t going to let this break her. So she stood there in the rain and stared at the sky, letting her head fall back and allowing the rain drops to splash upon her pale face. She noticed her tears flowed easier this way and closed her eyes. She sighed deeply and let the events of the day flash beneath her eyelids. The fake smiles and laughs haunted her. The eyes she thought she knew so well. The hands that seemed to be there to help her up, but let her fall at the last second. The betrayal. The lies. The heartache. The pain. The anger. What had she done to deserve this? She knew she was far from perfect, but she did the best she could. Why did it have to be this way? They were not her family. Not in her eyes, at least. And then she couldn’t hold it back any longer. She sobbed loudly and didn’t care who heard. She was hurt. In every sense of the word. It felt good to let herself completely go.

After a few minutes, she had completely relaxed and looked to the ground. Searching for something; something deep within her. And then she found it. She stared at the horizon before she started running again, this time she knew where she was going. She cared what was at the end of this journey because it was him. It had always been him. Even when she had pushed him away. Even when she hated him for letting her do so. But she hadn’t known this feeling. She pushed it away and locked it deep down inside of her because it scared her. It scared her that he made her lose control. How could he completely destroy the walls she put up with just his smile? It was as if she were a completely different person with him. But it was with him, that her true self showed, and that made her feel vulnerable. She didn’t like it at all. But she needed him right then. Needed him more than she had ever needed someone in her entire life.

Her heart beat with excitement. She couldn’t wait see his face. To feel his skin against hers. These thoughts made her want to smile, but she held it back. She wanted to save the smile for when she saw his face. And as she passed a train station, she looked to the big clock that stood at its entrance. It was nearly midnight. She knew exactly where he was. But she hadn’t the slightest idea where she herself was. She stopped running and searched for street signs and once she spotted one, she immediately knew where she was. How could she have forgotten these streets? The streets on which she walked with him. He wasn’t far. He’d soon be getting off of work at the diner not too far from his house. She had met him there. The first thing he ever said to her, “What can I get for ya?,” echoed in her mind. It had been a night like this. But she had driven her car and had been looking for a place to relax her mind, so she pulled into the parking lot of a diner she had she had driven by the day before and went in for nothing more than a cup of coffee and ended up coming out with a new friend. After he had gotten her the coffee, she sat there staring into nothing for what seemed like a long time. His shift was over and he was just about to leave when he saw her still sitting there. She was staring out the large windows and didn’t notice him staring at her. But he had walked up to her and invited himself to sit down and just began to talk about nothing. At first, she was confused. Who was this guy and what was he even saying? But it was the way he spoke that pulled her in. He spoke without the slightest care in the world; as if there was no such thing as worry, or pain, or sadness and he smiled as he did so. She thought he was beautiful. His deep sea green eyes and his dark hair against his tan skin made her wish she could stare at him forever. Soon they began talking as if they’d been friends for the longest of time. She’d remember that night forever, the night they spoke until dawn, and so would he.

The rain was beginning to let up, only a few drops falling here and there. She was standing on the other side of the street of where the diner was. The big front windows revealed the three or four people that lingered inside. Fellow insomniacs. And then she saw him. He was walking out of the front double doors with his backpack slung over his right shoulder. And for some reason he paused and looked up and saw her standing there. He immediately began to walk towards her with a worried and confused look on his face, but she smiled. She smiled so wide, it made her cheeks sting and the tears began to stream down her face once more. But this time there was no rain to hide them, and she didn’t care. She was just so happy to see him. And him seeing her that way, made him stop in his tracks. He had never seen her look so defeat and happy at the same time. But she needed to be near him right then. She needed to feel him next to her. So she kept her eyes on him, never wavering for even an instant, and began to cross the street between them. She wanted to run to him, but she kept herself composed and took it one step at a time. She wasn’t even sure how he felt, but that didn’t matter. She’d tell him everything. But as she passed the halfway mark, she saw his face change. He seemed to say her name. Alice. But she didn’t hear him and he was no longer looking at her but to the right of her. He looked frightened, terrified, and she wondered why. So she looked to where he was looking and she saw it, just a few feet away from her, a truck speeding down the road. Its lights blinded her. And in that moment, she had it. She had her serenity. The serenity she had always been hoping for.