Curing My Insomnia

Written on the plane ride to Chicago, IL 07-19-2008

 Unable to sleep

I consider possibilities

Thinking deeply

Deeply breathing

I tease my own inadequacies

Hoping to see

Something beyond me

"You must love yourself"

Those words stain with pain

Its logical

But its out of my frame

I'm outside of my box

Unstable and lame

Broken...refurbished

Usable but maimed

It is strange

Because I have the range of a gun

With a 20" blade

That only slays

Those who have lost their way

Yet its concealed

And wielded by one

Who can't even reveal his own fate

Misguided and fighting

For and elevated state

I wait, bide my time

And contemplate

While endless rage

Invades my veins

And filters my thoughts

In shameful ways.

 

I cast aside blasphemy

I put this and that past me

Beliefs are yours

And yours alone

Don't let anyone tell you differently

Consistently I conjure courage

To cure my insomnia

Bombing my medulla oblongata

Suffocate it in marijuana

And I never thought I'd wanna

Be something other than content

Victimized in my own mind

I'm becoming hell bent

And as my sins are trivial

Compared to that of the world

I'd right all my wrongs

To have that perfect baby girl

I'd write all new songs

Just to have someone

Share in my world

Yet my insomnia is uncured

And like a bird I question my flight

My place in the world

My "god-given" rights

So I sit up at night

And infiltrate my mind

With the hopes that one day I'll find

My bundle of joy

And the apple of my eye.

Author's Note

Sucks being lonely fo sho....

Reviews

[Charlie Drake]

Very reflective! Your words give the reader deep insight to your emotions. It is odd to use phrases like "bundle of joy" or "apple of my eye" when refering to a lover though. Usually these nicknames are meant more for a baby.

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

This is great. Sounds like it should be shouted at an audience at a Poetry Slam - reads thoroughly well. Nice work.
Light,
Siddartha

[BlackOpal]

Great piece.
I know how insomnia feels.
I loved the rhyme that it had. The piece seemed fast-paced, and it worked really well.
Amazing job.